Thursday 30 December 2010
When you speak too soon.
The not-flu became full flu the day before yesterday. I don't actually remember much of yesterday such was the fever. I feel a lot better today, but moving and breathing is still pretty hard. I really don't have much energy to type a lot so I'll end here.
Tuesday 28 December 2010
"I think this is what men call a 'terminal case of manflu'"
True to form, I have been very ill over Christmas. It isn't flu, because I'm able to type this. However, it has all the symptoms of being a mild version of it. So if you are wondering why I have been so quiet on the internet over the last week, than that is the reason.
Normal service will be resumed hopefully by next week when I can breathe, hear, not feel like my clothes are made of sandpaper, not be being dehydrated via my nose and have energy.
Normal service will be resumed hopefully by next week when I can breathe, hear, not feel like my clothes are made of sandpaper, not be being dehydrated via my nose and have energy.
Sunday 19 December 2010
Trafford Centre Waterstones signing date confirmed.
I have just been told that another signing date has been confirmed. This will be for Saturday the 22nd of January 2011 at the Waterstones branch in the Trafford centre, Manchester. I will be signing at the usual time (from 10:30am).
Preston Waterstones will still be on Saturday the 29th of January (the weekend afterwards) and hopefully there will also be repeat trips to Waterstones branches we have been to before including Bolton and Durham. There are also other unconfirmed venues still to announce.
Preston Waterstones will still be on Saturday the 29th of January (the weekend afterwards) and hopefully there will also be repeat trips to Waterstones branches we have been to before including Bolton and Durham. There are also other unconfirmed venues still to announce.
The Bolton signing debrief.
The book signing at Bolton went very well yesterday. There had been tons of snow overnight, that had started on Friday. I knew that there might be a few issues when I was driving home late on Friday with two inches already down and more falling, and my wiper blades froze leaving me driving like a tank commander.
Of course, Bolton Waterstones has the advantage that it is within walking distance from my house. It was a bit slippy due to the two inches having become closer to six overnight. Once we got to the store, it started snowing heavily again outside. However, as the last shopping weekend before Christmas, people were a determined bunch and the numbers coming through were all right. The staff at the shop were fantastic, and I have to give a shout out to one particular gentleman on staff who was very good at steering potential customers in my direction and helped it to be a very good signing.
I got a chance to speak to a few people who had been at the last Bolton signing as they passed through, and it was nice to get some feedback from those who had read it. All the reports were extremely good; the consensus is that this is a well-written book that is accessible and enjoyable to read. Phew! That's a relief! The journey home was very slippery, but I made it all right. It certainly got cold though.
I've been invited back sometime in the new year. This is likely to be in early February now due to other commitments for signings including the Preston Waterstones event on the 29th of January 2011. I only hope that January will continue to be as successful as November and December have been.
Of course, Bolton Waterstones has the advantage that it is within walking distance from my house. It was a bit slippy due to the two inches having become closer to six overnight. Once we got to the store, it started snowing heavily again outside. However, as the last shopping weekend before Christmas, people were a determined bunch and the numbers coming through were all right. The staff at the shop were fantastic, and I have to give a shout out to one particular gentleman on staff who was very good at steering potential customers in my direction and helped it to be a very good signing.
I got a chance to speak to a few people who had been at the last Bolton signing as they passed through, and it was nice to get some feedback from those who had read it. All the reports were extremely good; the consensus is that this is a well-written book that is accessible and enjoyable to read. Phew! That's a relief! The journey home was very slippery, but I made it all right. It certainly got cold though.
I've been invited back sometime in the new year. This is likely to be in early February now due to other commitments for signings including the Preston Waterstones event on the 29th of January 2011. I only hope that January will continue to be as successful as November and December have been.
Wednesday 15 December 2010
All over the house » Archive » The luckiest man
In some ways this reminds me of when I was at school.
All over the house » Archive » The luckiest man
All over the house » Archive » The luckiest man
Sunday 12 December 2010
Learning a few tips on the book signing trail.
The busy three signings in four days is done, and I'm back at home after driving nearly 300 miles. I thought I would share a few of the things that I have learnt over the last few weeks on the signings trail. When first starting out it is difficult to know what to expect. I have never been to another author's signing to get a book signed, so cannot claim to have seen what goes on first hand until now. Writing is a solitary business, and there is no 'manual' or little club where authors chat at length to be able to get an impression in advance.
1.) Take some books with you. Especially if your publisher is a small press who is not yet on a general stock with Waterstones. For some reason books can and do get lost somewhere in the system and fail to arrive at the bookshop you are supposed to be signing at. I have a box of 44 in the boot of the car whenever I'm off to a signing. My publisher said it was a good idea, and on several occasions it certainl;y was. Even if the actual stock has arrived, sometimes you can sell out and it's nice to sell a few extra whilst you are there. Any of your stock you use the bookshop will replenish once their actual stock comes through.
2.) You will be mistaken for shop staff frequently. Up until I started the signing tour I had completely missed the significance of the scene at the start of the film "1408" based on a Stephen King short story. There the author is asked about the whereabouts in the shop of another author's books. I reckon that for every one person who asks about my book, another three ask me where they can find the cookery section or a book about X. Just smile and point them on to the actual staff or be clever and point out what they want if you know where it happens to be. Even with a big stand with posters and your books on they will do this. Hell, I wasn't even wearing the same colour clothes as the bookshop staff's uniforms.
3.) Smile and be nice. Say hello to people who go past, and if they hesitate and look to the books, tell them the genre and that you are an author on a book signing. You will snare a great many people this way who will take a look and maybe even buy a copy. If you sit and say nothing I guarantee that almost all will pass you by (or ask where the newest Harry Potter tome can be found). As a start out author you will get most of your books purchased by this pro-active effort. Whatever you do, don't do the hard sell because it will annoy people and get you no extra sales. It will also even put off some people that were wavering and they will pass you by.
4.) Don't stereotype. Regardless of the genre you write in, its readers do not all look the same or how you imagine. I get a lot of books signed because some-one is buying a present for a niece or nephew. I also had a famous Sci-fi artist from 2000AD buy a book, and he looked like my Grandfather - or about as far removed from an avid sci-fi reader as I could imagine. He was a very nice bloke too. Say hello and smile to everyone, because you never know who the people are who would like a copy of your book.
5.) Nothing gets people interested more than other people at your table talking about your book or getting one signed. Feel free to chat; not even necessarily about your book. A lot of people are interested in the writing process or even books you like to read yourself. Just keep an eye out for other people hovering behind them who might be coming closer to see what's getting people's interest up.
6.) When you sign your book, don't sign it like you would sign a cheque or a delivery slip. People want a signature that looks like your name, and not like some-one used the first page of the book to test a biro was working. My author signature looks like my name written in a fast artsy style, but it is still readable as my name. My signature, on the other hand, looks like some-one testing a pen. It probably also pays not to hand out an example of the signature that gets access all areas on your bank account and life.
7.) Unless specifically asked to dedicate the book to X, don't. There is a small minority of people who will get a book signed then hide it elsewhere in the shop without any intention of buying it. If all the book says is "best wishes" then your name, the book is still saleable. There is also less chance of you misspelling a name, then having to do another one to correct it. It's also handy to have a pad to be able to confirm spellings with people. You would be amazed to how many names your brain suddenly decides "I can give you three different ways of spelling that". The pad also allows you to keep a discrete tally of how many books you have shifted.
8.) Don't read a book or get lost in writing your next one whilst you are there. If you look engrossed in something or disinterested in the signing, people won't disturb you and won't ask for a copy of your book.
9.) At the end of the gig, politely offer to sign any remaining stock copies of your book. There's a few reasons for this. A lot of shops sell books "signed by the author" and it gives them something marketable. People who didn't make it to your signing on the day can still get a signed copy of your book. On the day you will find a lot of people may look, ask questions and chat but not actually commit and buy. In the days after I do a signing a lot of shops report an increase in sales of my book as some of these people come back to buy. People often don't like to commit in the moment. Other people also don't like to make a decision whilst they feel you are watching them. I suppose it can be intimidating. That's one of the reasons I always slip a couple of copies into the appropriate book section so that people can look at the book at their own pace where I can't see them. The other reason to sign books is that (as was explained to me at a multi-author signing event by an older hand) ever copy signed is a sale - the shop can't actually return it for a credit. Don't just sign every copy willy-nilly. Ask first otherwise you will not be asked back and may get into trouble. But if they give permission, then go for it!
10.) Time of year and repeat visits can be critical, especially for a newer unknown author. Part of the process is actually about raising the profile of your book. If people see the cover of your book, the next time they will see it as familiar and are more likely to buy. People like familiarity. A repeat visit can generate a lot more sales simply because some of the same people are passing through and saw you before. Sending posters in advance of events for the bookshop to put up to advertise your book and the event can help in this area too. In the immediate weeks before Christmas, there will be hoards of people, but they will be busier buying "The Christmas bumper book of crud" than regular books. Sales of regular lines in bookshops suffer at Christmas losing out to the seasonal stuff.
11.) The media is your friend. Send information and features to local newspapers in the run up to signings. Often they will be only too glad of some material of local relevance to fill the pages. It also gives you a nice smug feeling to know that a few thousand people are seeing the front cover of your book in the local papers. Also trail the signing events online, but don't do it to the point of appearing to spam sites as this will put people off.
I think that covers the main points. I'm sure I've missed something, and there will almost certainly be other things that I learn in the coming weeks. So far I know that it is a steep learning curve, but it's a great deal of fun and it beats having a real job. I also get the satisfaction of seeing my books actually sell and knowing each of those is a book that won't get returned to the publisher through Sale or Return.
1.) Take some books with you. Especially if your publisher is a small press who is not yet on a general stock with Waterstones. For some reason books can and do get lost somewhere in the system and fail to arrive at the bookshop you are supposed to be signing at. I have a box of 44 in the boot of the car whenever I'm off to a signing. My publisher said it was a good idea, and on several occasions it certainl;y was. Even if the actual stock has arrived, sometimes you can sell out and it's nice to sell a few extra whilst you are there. Any of your stock you use the bookshop will replenish once their actual stock comes through.
2.) You will be mistaken for shop staff frequently. Up until I started the signing tour I had completely missed the significance of the scene at the start of the film "1408" based on a Stephen King short story. There the author is asked about the whereabouts in the shop of another author's books. I reckon that for every one person who asks about my book, another three ask me where they can find the cookery section or a book about X. Just smile and point them on to the actual staff or be clever and point out what they want if you know where it happens to be. Even with a big stand with posters and your books on they will do this. Hell, I wasn't even wearing the same colour clothes as the bookshop staff's uniforms.
3.) Smile and be nice. Say hello to people who go past, and if they hesitate and look to the books, tell them the genre and that you are an author on a book signing. You will snare a great many people this way who will take a look and maybe even buy a copy. If you sit and say nothing I guarantee that almost all will pass you by (or ask where the newest Harry Potter tome can be found). As a start out author you will get most of your books purchased by this pro-active effort. Whatever you do, don't do the hard sell because it will annoy people and get you no extra sales. It will also even put off some people that were wavering and they will pass you by.
4.) Don't stereotype. Regardless of the genre you write in, its readers do not all look the same or how you imagine. I get a lot of books signed because some-one is buying a present for a niece or nephew. I also had a famous Sci-fi artist from 2000AD buy a book, and he looked like my Grandfather - or about as far removed from an avid sci-fi reader as I could imagine. He was a very nice bloke too. Say hello and smile to everyone, because you never know who the people are who would like a copy of your book.
5.) Nothing gets people interested more than other people at your table talking about your book or getting one signed. Feel free to chat; not even necessarily about your book. A lot of people are interested in the writing process or even books you like to read yourself. Just keep an eye out for other people hovering behind them who might be coming closer to see what's getting people's interest up.
6.) When you sign your book, don't sign it like you would sign a cheque or a delivery slip. People want a signature that looks like your name, and not like some-one used the first page of the book to test a biro was working. My author signature looks like my name written in a fast artsy style, but it is still readable as my name. My signature, on the other hand, looks like some-one testing a pen. It probably also pays not to hand out an example of the signature that gets access all areas on your bank account and life.
7.) Unless specifically asked to dedicate the book to X, don't. There is a small minority of people who will get a book signed then hide it elsewhere in the shop without any intention of buying it. If all the book says is "best wishes" then your name, the book is still saleable. There is also less chance of you misspelling a name, then having to do another one to correct it. It's also handy to have a pad to be able to confirm spellings with people. You would be amazed to how many names your brain suddenly decides "I can give you three different ways of spelling that". The pad also allows you to keep a discrete tally of how many books you have shifted.
8.) Don't read a book or get lost in writing your next one whilst you are there. If you look engrossed in something or disinterested in the signing, people won't disturb you and won't ask for a copy of your book.
9.) At the end of the gig, politely offer to sign any remaining stock copies of your book. There's a few reasons for this. A lot of shops sell books "signed by the author" and it gives them something marketable. People who didn't make it to your signing on the day can still get a signed copy of your book. On the day you will find a lot of people may look, ask questions and chat but not actually commit and buy. In the days after I do a signing a lot of shops report an increase in sales of my book as some of these people come back to buy. People often don't like to commit in the moment. Other people also don't like to make a decision whilst they feel you are watching them. I suppose it can be intimidating. That's one of the reasons I always slip a couple of copies into the appropriate book section so that people can look at the book at their own pace where I can't see them. The other reason to sign books is that (as was explained to me at a multi-author signing event by an older hand) ever copy signed is a sale - the shop can't actually return it for a credit. Don't just sign every copy willy-nilly. Ask first otherwise you will not be asked back and may get into trouble. But if they give permission, then go for it!
10.) Time of year and repeat visits can be critical, especially for a newer unknown author. Part of the process is actually about raising the profile of your book. If people see the cover of your book, the next time they will see it as familiar and are more likely to buy. People like familiarity. A repeat visit can generate a lot more sales simply because some of the same people are passing through and saw you before. Sending posters in advance of events for the bookshop to put up to advertise your book and the event can help in this area too. In the immediate weeks before Christmas, there will be hoards of people, but they will be busier buying "The Christmas bumper book of crud" than regular books. Sales of regular lines in bookshops suffer at Christmas losing out to the seasonal stuff.
11.) The media is your friend. Send information and features to local newspapers in the run up to signings. Often they will be only too glad of some material of local relevance to fill the pages. It also gives you a nice smug feeling to know that a few thousand people are seeing the front cover of your book in the local papers. Also trail the signing events online, but don't do it to the point of appearing to spam sites as this will put people off.
I think that covers the main points. I'm sure I've missed something, and there will almost certainly be other things that I learn in the coming weeks. So far I know that it is a steep learning curve, but it's a great deal of fun and it beats having a real job. I also get the satisfaction of seeing my books actually sell and knowing each of those is a book that won't get returned to the publisher through Sale or Return.
Friday 10 December 2010
Manchester signing and a chat with a footballer
Last night was the Big Event at Waterstones in Manchester. It is a huge Waterstones branch, for anyone who has never been there. Spread over three floors, it is truly massive, so the fifteen authors were lost into its top two floors. Initially I was in the SF section (as you might expect), but passing trade proved to be quite thin on the ground so I was moved to next to Rich Holden, the footballer. It made for some interesting conversation and it is strange to be given accountancy and tax tips from a footballer. But alas the weather and the television (apparently 13 million people were at home watching a live anniversary episode of Coronation Street which has to leave a dent in anyone's passing trade) conspired against the event.
It was a strange result, in that few people actually got signed books from any of us, but we were all asked by staff to sign a large number of books each which were then stickered up as "signed by the author at Waterstones" for selling over the coming weeks. Including those sold on the night, that makes it another record number, even if it felt a little like cheating. So if you are in Manchester over the coming weeks and want a signed copy then Manchester Deansgate Waterstones has them in stock - get them while you can!
This weekend I shall be in the North East at Durham Waterstones on the Saturday and Darlington Waterstones on the Sunday. These are all day events and should be busy, so see me there!
It was a strange result, in that few people actually got signed books from any of us, but we were all asked by staff to sign a large number of books each which were then stickered up as "signed by the author at Waterstones" for selling over the coming weeks. Including those sold on the night, that makes it another record number, even if it felt a little like cheating. So if you are in Manchester over the coming weeks and want a signed copy then Manchester Deansgate Waterstones has them in stock - get them while you can!
This weekend I shall be in the North East at Durham Waterstones on the Saturday and Darlington Waterstones on the Sunday. These are all day events and should be busy, so see me there!
Tuesday 7 December 2010
Press release for Thursday's signing event.
Waterstone’s Press Release
Date of release: 23rd November 2010
Stars come out for The Deansgate Christmas Signings
Meet favourite authors, enjoy music, magic and cupcakes and get in the festive spirit at Waterstone’s Deansgate from 6pm on Thursday 9th December when the city centre bookshop hosts The Deansgate Christmas Signings.
15 authors will be attending this very special event, with shoppers getting the chance to meet the Poet Laureate Carol Ann Duffy, designer Nicky Haslam, DJ Dave Haslam, entertainer Mike Harding, footballer Rick Holden, garden expert Anna Pavord and historian Juliet Barker amongst others. Young bookworms will get the chance to meet children’s author Diana Shaw and bestselling kids book illustrator Jane Ray. Writers from Manchester’s thriving literary scene will also be in attendance including Jennifer Kirk and Steve Worthington, and all of the authors appearing will be signing copies of their books, which will make ideal Christmas presents for friends and family.
There’ll also be entertainment from Lime Tree Primary School Choir & the James Goodwin Stage School, music from cellist Li Lu and magic from Jez Mansfield.
Hey Little Cup Cakes will be offering samples of their yummy wares, and there will be festive refreshments on sale at 2nd View Restaurant and Bar including Warm Mulled Wine & Cider, Christmas Cocktails and mince pies.
Waterstone’s Manchester Deansgate events coordinator Vivien Hamilton says
“I love Christmas and so decided I wanted to organize a really festive extravaganza for all our customers to enjoy. We’ve had such a fantastic response from writers and illustrators that we hope to make The Deansgate Christmas Signings an annual event, and for it to become a major fixture on Manchester’s cultural calendar.”
For further information please contact Waterstone’s Deansgate on 0843 2908485
- ends –
Media enquiries
Please contact
Vivien Hamilton
Waterstone’s Manchester Deansgate Events Coordinator
Tel 0843 2908485
Email vivien.Hamilton@me.com
Mel Harris
Waterstone’s Press Office
Tel 0115 9419863
Email mel.harris@waterstones.com
Notes to Editors
The Deansgate Christmas Signings event will be held on Thursday 9th December from 6pm at Waterstone’s, 91 Deansgate, Manchester M3 2BW Tel 0843 2908485
The authors who will be attending are:
Carol Ann Duffy
Author of Mrs Scrooge (Picador £4.99) and Another Night Before Christmas (Picador £4.99)
Nicky Haslam
author of Redeeming Features (Vintage £9.99)
Rick Holden
author of Football: It's a Minging Life (DB Publishing £16.99)
Andrew Bibby
author of The BackBone of England (Frances Lincoln £20)
Jane Ray
Author of Ahmed and the Feather Girl (Frances Lincoln £11.99)
Dave Haslam
Author of Manchester England (Fourth Estate £8.99)
Deborah Hudson & Tony Husband
Authors of Sing Your Heart Out (Schott Music £4.99)
Diana Shaw
Author of Septimus Smythe and the Spectre Detectors (Quick Brown Fox £4.99)
Anna Pavord
author of The Curious Gardener (Bloomsbury £20)
Steve Hollyman
Author of Keeping Britain Tidy (Transmission Print £8.99)
Steve Worthington
Author of Once In a Blue Moon (The History Press £8.99)
Juliet Barker
Author of The Brontes (Abacus £14.99)
Jennifer Kirk
Author of Bringing Home the Stars (DS Press £7.99
Mike Harding
Author of Strange Lights over Bexleyheath (Luath Press £9.99
Date of release: 23rd November 2010
Stars come out for The Deansgate Christmas Signings
Meet favourite authors, enjoy music, magic and cupcakes and get in the festive spirit at Waterstone’s Deansgate from 6pm on Thursday 9th December when the city centre bookshop hosts The Deansgate Christmas Signings.
15 authors will be attending this very special event, with shoppers getting the chance to meet the Poet Laureate Carol Ann Duffy, designer Nicky Haslam, DJ Dave Haslam, entertainer Mike Harding, footballer Rick Holden, garden expert Anna Pavord and historian Juliet Barker amongst others. Young bookworms will get the chance to meet children’s author Diana Shaw and bestselling kids book illustrator Jane Ray. Writers from Manchester’s thriving literary scene will also be in attendance including Jennifer Kirk and Steve Worthington, and all of the authors appearing will be signing copies of their books, which will make ideal Christmas presents for friends and family.
There’ll also be entertainment from Lime Tree Primary School Choir & the James Goodwin Stage School, music from cellist Li Lu and magic from Jez Mansfield.
Hey Little Cup Cakes will be offering samples of their yummy wares, and there will be festive refreshments on sale at 2nd View Restaurant and Bar including Warm Mulled Wine & Cider, Christmas Cocktails and mince pies.
Waterstone’s Manchester Deansgate events coordinator Vivien Hamilton says
“I love Christmas and so decided I wanted to organize a really festive extravaganza for all our customers to enjoy. We’ve had such a fantastic response from writers and illustrators that we hope to make The Deansgate Christmas Signings an annual event, and for it to become a major fixture on Manchester’s cultural calendar.”
For further information please contact Waterstone’s Deansgate on 0843 2908485
- ends –
Media enquiries
Please contact
Vivien Hamilton
Waterstone’s Manchester Deansgate Events Coordinator
Tel 0843 2908485
Email vivien.Hamilton@me.com
Mel Harris
Waterstone’s Press Office
Tel 0115 9419863
Email mel.harris@waterstones.com
Notes to Editors
The Deansgate Christmas Signings event will be held on Thursday 9th December from 6pm at Waterstone’s, 91 Deansgate, Manchester M3 2BW Tel 0843 2908485
The authors who will be attending are:
Carol Ann Duffy
Author of Mrs Scrooge (Picador £4.99) and Another Night Before Christmas (Picador £4.99)
Nicky Haslam
author of Redeeming Features (Vintage £9.99)
Rick Holden
author of Football: It's a Minging Life (DB Publishing £16.99)
Andrew Bibby
author of The BackBone of England (Frances Lincoln £20)
Jane Ray
Author of Ahmed and the Feather Girl (Frances Lincoln £11.99)
Dave Haslam
Author of Manchester England (Fourth Estate £8.99)
Deborah Hudson & Tony Husband
Authors of Sing Your Heart Out (Schott Music £4.99)
Diana Shaw
Author of Septimus Smythe and the Spectre Detectors (Quick Brown Fox £4.99)
Anna Pavord
author of The Curious Gardener (Bloomsbury £20)
Steve Hollyman
Author of Keeping Britain Tidy (Transmission Print £8.99)
Steve Worthington
Author of Once In a Blue Moon (The History Press £8.99)
Juliet Barker
Author of The Brontes (Abacus £14.99)
Jennifer Kirk
Author of Bringing Home the Stars (DS Press £7.99
Mike Harding
Author of Strange Lights over Bexleyheath (Luath Press £9.99
Localised flooding in the bathroom on the way to the (home) office.
All over the house this week on Monday comes out of its long-running and hard-hitting storyline with a comic that is maybe something like my daily 'commute' to the home office? I have to say I quite like this one and it has been sitting in the stack of strip ideas for a while.
Thursday 2 December 2010
Snow? What snow?
I am well aware that the rest of the country seems to have disappeared under a blanket of white, cold fluffy stuff. But here in Bolton - a place not normally noted for its temperate weather - we have had barely a dusting. There isn't even enough for making the customary snowman. Of course, everything looks prettified, but I wanted to go sledging and generally act like a child but with an excuse this time.
Why does the UK always grind to a halt in sub zero temperatures? Is it a perception thing? I wonder what people from other places that have hard winters think - I've seen enough videos on YouTube of cars slip-sliding their way around Moscow or New York to know that adverse weather is certainly not monopolised by Great Britain. Maybe people in these places always lambaste their fellow residents for being muppets in the snow and harbour the misunderstanding that somehow we are coping here in Britain quite well. Or maybe it is just that GB is run by a culture of incompetent managers who couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery?
I quite enjoy driving in the snow. I see it as a challenge to my skills. Before now I have taken a big rig with pride through a technically closed A19 in North Yorkshire without incident. On the way the biggest problem was getting around vehicles that muppets seem determined to just dump in the middle of the road. People, if you are going to abandon your car in a little snow, at least have the good grace to push it to the side of the road and not leave it straddling two lanes of a major highway so that others struggle to get past.
At the moment I'm happily working from home editing up a new edition of 'The Atlantic Connection' Whether it snows heavily around here yet, or not, work still goes on. One thing I will say is that those energy efficiency grants that we got in 2009 for insulating the cavities and the loft really were money well spent (they didn't cost us a penny) and you can certainly tell the difference. Given how they worked out free for most people and a token payment for everyone else, I am left wondering why those who did not take them up chose not to. If only we could have got all new windows and doors too we would be snuggling in the warmest house this side of the garden fence. The only thing we lack is a wood burning stove for that full on Christmas feel. You know, you really miss the fireplaces in these old houses the once-in-a-blue-moon that it is cold enough to get good use out of them. Still, there's always next yet. Santa would only burn his tootsies on the way down anyway.
Why does the UK always grind to a halt in sub zero temperatures? Is it a perception thing? I wonder what people from other places that have hard winters think - I've seen enough videos on YouTube of cars slip-sliding their way around Moscow or New York to know that adverse weather is certainly not monopolised by Great Britain. Maybe people in these places always lambaste their fellow residents for being muppets in the snow and harbour the misunderstanding that somehow we are coping here in Britain quite well. Or maybe it is just that GB is run by a culture of incompetent managers who couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery?
I quite enjoy driving in the snow. I see it as a challenge to my skills. Before now I have taken a big rig with pride through a technically closed A19 in North Yorkshire without incident. On the way the biggest problem was getting around vehicles that muppets seem determined to just dump in the middle of the road. People, if you are going to abandon your car in a little snow, at least have the good grace to push it to the side of the road and not leave it straddling two lanes of a major highway so that others struggle to get past.
At the moment I'm happily working from home editing up a new edition of 'The Atlantic Connection' Whether it snows heavily around here yet, or not, work still goes on. One thing I will say is that those energy efficiency grants that we got in 2009 for insulating the cavities and the loft really were money well spent (they didn't cost us a penny) and you can certainly tell the difference. Given how they worked out free for most people and a token payment for everyone else, I am left wondering why those who did not take them up chose not to. If only we could have got all new windows and doors too we would be snuggling in the warmest house this side of the garden fence. The only thing we lack is a wood burning stove for that full on Christmas feel. You know, you really miss the fireplaces in these old houses the once-in-a-blue-moon that it is cold enough to get good use out of them. Still, there's always next yet. Santa would only burn his tootsies on the way down anyway.
Monday 29 November 2010
Just when you thought I'd learnt
I've re-cracked a rib by means of, of all things, pulling a bottom sheet onto a mattress. The crack was so loud that even Zoë heard it. Looks like I'm back to the beginning on the recovery and Must Learn To Not Do Strenuous Things.
I'll learn eventually. Just whether it will be quick enough for my ribs to heal will be another thing.
I'll learn eventually. Just whether it will be quick enough for my ribs to heal will be another thing.
Leslie Nielsen passed away.
It is with some sadness that I learnt this morning that actor Leslie Nielsen has died of pneumonia. Some of the first comedy that I watched and loved as a young child was Police Squad. He will be missed, though his influence will live on.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-11860014
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-us-canada-11860014
Sunday 28 November 2010
One giant leap for a trainee moron.
Last week I managed to do the dumbest thing yet. "How did you manage to top the last dumb thing?" I hear you cry. Thanks. Well, my parents are putting in an extension to allow for a larger conservatory. All well and good, but at the moment this entails a large six feet deep hole by the existing conservatory door. Not moments before I investigated new depths of stupidity even for me I had been looking at this hole out of the window.
My parents have three cats, one of whom has the nasty habit of treating building work - especially any sand or fine gravel - as one big kitty en suite. I spied one of these little cute and fluffy poo machines at work, and immediately unlocked the conservatory door to shoo her off. I think you can see where this is going? One small step for woman, one giant fall flat on her face for Jenny.
I don't bounce as well as I used to. It's funny how there was a brief moment after impact where I lay there sprawled in the mud thinking "Shouldn't have done that, stupid". The bruises on my hands and legs came up quite quickly, but surprisingly it was only the following morning that the cracked ribs let themselves be known. There is no bruising whatsoever on my chest, but for a while I could hear and feel noises that should never come from one's own chest every time I sneezed. It has also been hard to take a full breath without pain meaning that I get out of breath fairly quickly. The pain is not as bad as it was a couple of days ago, thanks for asking, but it is still letting me know just how stoooopid I was.
I'm told I should be healed enough to get my little flim-flam machine back on the road looking for the next moronic thing to do within a week or so.
My parents have three cats, one of whom has the nasty habit of treating building work - especially any sand or fine gravel - as one big kitty en suite. I spied one of these little cute and fluffy poo machines at work, and immediately unlocked the conservatory door to shoo her off. I think you can see where this is going? One small step for woman, one giant fall flat on her face for Jenny.
I don't bounce as well as I used to. It's funny how there was a brief moment after impact where I lay there sprawled in the mud thinking "Shouldn't have done that, stupid". The bruises on my hands and legs came up quite quickly, but surprisingly it was only the following morning that the cracked ribs let themselves be known. There is no bruising whatsoever on my chest, but for a while I could hear and feel noises that should never come from one's own chest every time I sneezed. It has also been hard to take a full breath without pain meaning that I get out of breath fairly quickly. The pain is not as bad as it was a couple of days ago, thanks for asking, but it is still letting me know just how stoooopid I was.
I'm told I should be healed enough to get my little flim-flam machine back on the road looking for the next moronic thing to do within a week or so.
Saturday 27 November 2010
LP Vs CD Vs MP3?
An LP is completely analogue in its sound reproduction, just like actual musical instruments, the speakers on a stereo and, of course, the way the human ear then deciphers these sounds. Making something digital between the actual playing in the recording session and the playback on the stereo was just adding in a middleman. Digital is a stepped response, whereas analogue is a smooth curve between the frequencies. This meant that there were a whole host of subtle frequencies that would be lost in the resolution of a digital disk (CD) that weren't on an analogue one (LP). Add to that that certain very high frequencies and very low frequencies were lost outside of the range of a CD. Whilst these cannot be heard by a human ear as actual discernible sound, they are nonetheless detected and their absence will make music sound somehow not quite right.
The difference in reproduction quality between a cheap turntable/stylus combo and an expensive one is massive; the format's sound reproduction is easily destroyed by the cheap midi turntables that were once so common. The difference between a cheap and expensive CD player is not audibly anywhere near as much, so the average listener would be more likely to hear a poorer reproduction of an LP than they would a CD. The quality of the pressing too could make a massive difference, as cramming each side of the LP with as many grooves as possible, or pressing out of recycled vinyl and pressed thinly would also affect the sound quality. Anyone who has heard anything on the Telstar label, or the last three or four NOW LPs pressed to vinyl will know exactly what a rubbish pressing can sound like! However, 180gram virgin vinyl, with an album typically pressed to two, three or even four disks will give an excellent sound reproduction without any of the "this was recorded down a length of scaffolding tube" sound distortions of cheaper pressings.
I have put it to the test, with CD and LP copies of the same album. We aren't talking old pre-CD mastered copies either - I have Massive Attack's Mezzanine, Röyksopp's Melody AM and Kate Bush's Aerial on both formats each and have played them in a radio studio off a combination of the best Denon Cd players and Technics SL1210s with Ortofon stylii and faded between them for listeners in another room to guess which was which; nearly all guessed wrong assuming that the better bass and treble reproductions must have been coming from the CD. In reality, the difference isn't massive, and a lot of people will not easily tell the difference.
Looking after your LPs makes a difference. They are not as forgiving a format to poor treatment. But a clean and well cared for LP will never pop, crackle or hiss like frying bacon. Incidentally, LPs also out last CDs. One of the biggest issues with CDs is their known lifespan. After a couple of decades (less if stored badly or are defective) they will de-laminate, with atmospheric moisture creeping in from the edges showing up as a slightly milky band. There is nothing that can be done to retrieve a disk that has done this, and once it reaches the portion of the disk where the music is, the CD player's laser will struggle to read the data and ultimately will stop reading it at all. It isn't known how long LPs last; they haven't been around long enough to be certain. I have pressings from the 1950s that are still in good condition and play without surface noise. I also had some CDs from the early 1980s that have all gone to CD de-lamination heaven.
MP3s are just nasty, compressing similar frequencies together in a way that leaves the ear and brain knowing that there is something not fully right when comparing it to either a CD or LP. I also refuse to subscribe to a format that doesn't leave me with an actual physical tangible playback media with sleeve notes I can read through even though I've legitimately paid for it. I've also had too many terminal hard disk failures to trust anything that sits in the magical ether inside my computer.
The difference in reproduction quality between a cheap turntable/stylus combo and an expensive one is massive; the format's sound reproduction is easily destroyed by the cheap midi turntables that were once so common. The difference between a cheap and expensive CD player is not audibly anywhere near as much, so the average listener would be more likely to hear a poorer reproduction of an LP than they would a CD. The quality of the pressing too could make a massive difference, as cramming each side of the LP with as many grooves as possible, or pressing out of recycled vinyl and pressed thinly would also affect the sound quality. Anyone who has heard anything on the Telstar label, or the last three or four NOW LPs pressed to vinyl will know exactly what a rubbish pressing can sound like! However, 180gram virgin vinyl, with an album typically pressed to two, three or even four disks will give an excellent sound reproduction without any of the "this was recorded down a length of scaffolding tube" sound distortions of cheaper pressings.
I have put it to the test, with CD and LP copies of the same album. We aren't talking old pre-CD mastered copies either - I have Massive Attack's Mezzanine, Röyksopp's Melody AM and Kate Bush's Aerial on both formats each and have played them in a radio studio off a combination of the best Denon Cd players and Technics SL1210s with Ortofon stylii and faded between them for listeners in another room to guess which was which; nearly all guessed wrong assuming that the better bass and treble reproductions must have been coming from the CD. In reality, the difference isn't massive, and a lot of people will not easily tell the difference.
Looking after your LPs makes a difference. They are not as forgiving a format to poor treatment. But a clean and well cared for LP will never pop, crackle or hiss like frying bacon. Incidentally, LPs also out last CDs. One of the biggest issues with CDs is their known lifespan. After a couple of decades (less if stored badly or are defective) they will de-laminate, with atmospheric moisture creeping in from the edges showing up as a slightly milky band. There is nothing that can be done to retrieve a disk that has done this, and once it reaches the portion of the disk where the music is, the CD player's laser will struggle to read the data and ultimately will stop reading it at all. It isn't known how long LPs last; they haven't been around long enough to be certain. I have pressings from the 1950s that are still in good condition and play without surface noise. I also had some CDs from the early 1980s that have all gone to CD de-lamination heaven.
MP3s are just nasty, compressing similar frequencies together in a way that leaves the ear and brain knowing that there is something not fully right when comparing it to either a CD or LP. I also refuse to subscribe to a format that doesn't leave me with an actual physical tangible playback media with sleeve notes I can read through even though I've legitimately paid for it. I've also had too many terminal hard disk failures to trust anything that sits in the magical ether inside my computer.
Thursday 25 November 2010
is the iPad really the new market bigger than everything else?
I’ve just been reading an interesting article over at Alltop about how Richard Branson is intending to launch an iPad-only magazine next week. It raises some interesting issues in my mind.
As you all probably know, my publisher is All Mouse Media Ltd. It may at some point expand into magazines the comic-publishing arm is well and truly established. This makes me interested in why Branson would launch a new magazine that exists solely on one digital format.
The iPad is not the only handheld reading device. It competes with the Kindle, the Sony Reader and probably countless other devices that all want to do the same job for you: serve content in a hand-held format. Surely by limiting himself to one device, he is artificially limiting his market share, and thus the amount of money he can make from this new venture?
But then it hit me: that’s the point.
He’s limited his market on purpose. He’s using the magazine to test the idea that the iPad is the future, or that it has achieved such dominance that it can be a market unto himself. You can’t do that by launching a web magazine with a digital copy, or a print magazine with a digital copy. Your data gets swamped. Similarly, if you want to test the viability of the iPad as a distribution platform, you do it by launching on that device.
Branson has the resources available to launch a magazine that he can kill at any point. He seems to do things like this a lot; moving into areas of business where people say a new venture can’t last (trains, cola, radio, TV, etc) and testing whether that’s true or not. This is just another extension of his standard way of working.
So I’m going to be watching this development with keen eyes. If it proves successful, it could show where the market is going in the future. Print is almost certainly going to become more of a niche market than it already is within the next five to ten years, so it’s time we found where we’re all going to be getting our entertainment from in the future.
As you all probably know, my publisher is All Mouse Media Ltd. It may at some point expand into magazines the comic-publishing arm is well and truly established. This makes me interested in why Branson would launch a new magazine that exists solely on one digital format.
The iPad is not the only handheld reading device. It competes with the Kindle, the Sony Reader and probably countless other devices that all want to do the same job for you: serve content in a hand-held format. Surely by limiting himself to one device, he is artificially limiting his market share, and thus the amount of money he can make from this new venture?
But then it hit me: that’s the point.
He’s limited his market on purpose. He’s using the magazine to test the idea that the iPad is the future, or that it has achieved such dominance that it can be a market unto himself. You can’t do that by launching a web magazine with a digital copy, or a print magazine with a digital copy. Your data gets swamped. Similarly, if you want to test the viability of the iPad as a distribution platform, you do it by launching on that device.
Branson has the resources available to launch a magazine that he can kill at any point. He seems to do things like this a lot; moving into areas of business where people say a new venture can’t last (trains, cola, radio, TV, etc) and testing whether that’s true or not. This is just another extension of his standard way of working.
So I’m going to be watching this development with keen eyes. If it proves successful, it could show where the market is going in the future. Print is almost certainly going to become more of a niche market than it already is within the next five to ten years, so it’s time we found where we’re all going to be getting our entertainment from in the future.
Tuesday 23 November 2010
Tweet, tweet.
'I used to be with it'
This is one for all the Twitter devotees amongst you. Just remember this next time you have to rely on Twitter posts as your defence...
This is one for all the Twitter devotees amongst you. Just remember this next time you have to rely on Twitter posts as your defence...
Friday 19 November 2010
More dates on the signing tour.
Another signing date is confirmed: Darlington Waterstones on Sunday the 12th of December. That means three signing events in two counties over four days!
Wednesday 17 November 2010
Dates for the signing tour.
A couple more dates for the signing tour have been confirmed today. So far the details are as follows:
* Manchester Deansgate Waterstones - 9th of December
* Durham Waterstones - 11th of December (this should also include a reading/Q&As at 10:30am)
* Preston Waterstones - 22nd January 2011
Also in the pipeline are Darlington Waterstones and Bolton Waterstones that would be repeat visits, following on from successful signing dates in October and November. I think there are a few others that All Mouse Media are trying to arrange, but I haven't heard anything back about these.
Watch this space for more details!
* Manchester Deansgate Waterstones - 9th of December
* Durham Waterstones - 11th of December (this should also include a reading/Q&As at 10:30am)
* Preston Waterstones - 22nd January 2011
Also in the pipeline are Darlington Waterstones and Bolton Waterstones that would be repeat visits, following on from successful signing dates in October and November. I think there are a few others that All Mouse Media are trying to arrange, but I haven't heard anything back about these.
Watch this space for more details!
Monday 15 November 2010
Kindle edition of BHTS
The Kindle edition of 'Bringing home the stars' has now appeared on Amazon.
And in case you missed the link it's here!.
And in case you missed the link it's here!.
Friday 12 November 2010
A little housekeeping and buying abroad.
Sales of 'Bringing home the stars' have been picking up a lot in the last two weeks. I'm hoping that this means that the book signings that I've been doing are having an effect. Even if people don't buy a copy there and then, maybe they are coming back to buy at a later date. As my sister always says of the media: "It's about being seen in the right places with the right people." There's a lot to be said for that.
On the publisher's website there's been a little calamity. Nothing major, but the 'buy it now' buttons disappeared after part of the site was overwritten accidentally with a previous pre-publication version of the pages. I don't think they were away very long, but they are back now. So anyone who has been trying to buy a copy through the publisher over the last couple of days who found they couldn't can now. I would also like to add that there are postage options for buyers in the US too. Whilst the book isn't on general release over there, individuals can buy it this way. It costs £7.50 postage inclusive, or whatever the dollar amount of that is.
On the publisher's website there's been a little calamity. Nothing major, but the 'buy it now' buttons disappeared after part of the site was overwritten accidentally with a previous pre-publication version of the pages. I don't think they were away very long, but they are back now. So anyone who has been trying to buy a copy through the publisher over the last couple of days who found they couldn't can now. I would also like to add that there are postage options for buyers in the US too. Whilst the book isn't on general release over there, individuals can buy it this way. It costs £7.50 postage inclusive, or whatever the dollar amount of that is.
Thursday 11 November 2010
Waterstones signings schedule.
This weekend's signing trail leads to Waterstones in Bolton. On Saturday the 13th of November I'll be there chatting and signing copies. Please pop down and say hello, and take the opportunity to pick up a copy of 'Bringing home the stars' if you haven't yet got a copy of it.
In addition, Durham Waterstones are interested in booking me for a signing event. Date and time TBC - watch this space!
In addition, Durham Waterstones are interested in booking me for a signing event. Date and time TBC - watch this space!
Tuesday 9 November 2010
We'll fix it in the rewrite.
Today I have finally managed to find some time to sit down and write something new. Well, nearly new. The promotion for 'Bringing home the stars' has been a toughie, but it's paying dividends. The problem is that that has left me with little time or energy for writing.
I've got ideas, but they've been on the back burner. Today I finally made some time and sat at the computer to work on the rewrite for 'The Atlantic Connection'. The eagle-eyed may notice this book having come and gone a couple of years ago. The story is one of my favourites, but I was less than happy with the way it read. They say publish and be damned, but instead I let it go out of print without being reprinted. Now it's being rewritten in its entirety and will hopefully resemble when it is finished more of the book that I originally envisaged. It's still early days though as I've managed only twenty pages of rewriting today. With the book signing coming up on Saturday, time is going to quickly be pressed again. Still, that's the way a writer's life works. Probably. What the hell do I know?
I've got ideas, but they've been on the back burner. Today I finally made some time and sat at the computer to work on the rewrite for 'The Atlantic Connection'. The eagle-eyed may notice this book having come and gone a couple of years ago. The story is one of my favourites, but I was less than happy with the way it read. They say publish and be damned, but instead I let it go out of print without being reprinted. Now it's being rewritten in its entirety and will hopefully resemble when it is finished more of the book that I originally envisaged. It's still early days though as I've managed only twenty pages of rewriting today. With the book signing coming up on Saturday, time is going to quickly be pressed again. Still, that's the way a writer's life works. Probably. What the hell do I know?
Christmas shopping, rambling, a glass of cocoa and a basque.
I went and finally started Christmas shopping today. It's hard work, knowing what everyone wants. The trouble with my family is that if they want something they don't pussyfoot around over it, but just make an effort to save up and buy it. What do you get the person who has everything, except perhaps a box to put it all in?
Luckily my parents have, in one super-cool swoop, made things a little easier by purchasing a Wii console. This is nominally for my little nephew who they look after quite a lot whilst my sister is at work. It will live at their house, so it means that they can use it too. So in one groovtastic move both my parents and little Zak can be entertained by Wii magic.
My other little nephew is at that very young age (this will be his first Christmas) where new outfits to wear are welcomed with open arms. They grow so fast at that age, so I guess Christmas and birthdays are a good opportunity to ease the burdon on poor Mummy and Daddy. I also bought Zoë's present. She's easy too; Amazon is the first port of call as she reads a lot of books, watches a lot of DVDs and plays a lot of console games. However, in Sweetens in Bolton they had a sale on which included a lot of Stephen King books with covers to match the set that she has amassed over the years. The wedge of paper that I have subsequently bought for her looks impressive to say the least!
Whilst in Marks & Spencer though I spotted something that really caught my eye. I was actually shopping for a present for some-one else, but my eye was drawn to the most gorgeous of basques. Now, anyone who has followed my witterings on the internet and in print for quite some time must be aware that I love lingerie. Not cheap tat, but the good stuff that's elegant and feminine. In particular, I love basques. I know that feminists will be engaging in synchronised tutting about now, but I love to know that my underwear is up to scratch and guaranteed to have any heterosexual man's pulse racing, if he knew. That said, few men ever get to see what I wear under the overwear, but I'm happy knowing that it's there. When I was a child my Mother instilled the importance of matching underwear in case I "got run over by a bus" - how pessimistic. Still, it worked because I've been wearing matching three part sets* ever since - no A&E orderly will be laughing at my choice of smalls any time soon.
The only problem is that it is £40. All I can hope is that either I get rich, and quick! Or that some turn up in the sales and I can snaffle one in my size. For those who want a link, it's here. Maybe some-one important at M&S will take pity and send this Z-list non-celebrity a free sample? I should coco.
*Yes boys, that does mean the thing that holds up stockings.
Luckily my parents have, in one super-cool swoop, made things a little easier by purchasing a Wii console. This is nominally for my little nephew who they look after quite a lot whilst my sister is at work. It will live at their house, so it means that they can use it too. So in one groovtastic move both my parents and little Zak can be entertained by Wii magic.
My other little nephew is at that very young age (this will be his first Christmas) where new outfits to wear are welcomed with open arms. They grow so fast at that age, so I guess Christmas and birthdays are a good opportunity to ease the burdon on poor Mummy and Daddy. I also bought Zoë's present. She's easy too; Amazon is the first port of call as she reads a lot of books, watches a lot of DVDs and plays a lot of console games. However, in Sweetens in Bolton they had a sale on which included a lot of Stephen King books with covers to match the set that she has amassed over the years. The wedge of paper that I have subsequently bought for her looks impressive to say the least!
Whilst in Marks & Spencer though I spotted something that really caught my eye. I was actually shopping for a present for some-one else, but my eye was drawn to the most gorgeous of basques. Now, anyone who has followed my witterings on the internet and in print for quite some time must be aware that I love lingerie. Not cheap tat, but the good stuff that's elegant and feminine. In particular, I love basques. I know that feminists will be engaging in synchronised tutting about now, but I love to know that my underwear is up to scratch and guaranteed to have any heterosexual man's pulse racing, if he knew. That said, few men ever get to see what I wear under the overwear, but I'm happy knowing that it's there. When I was a child my Mother instilled the importance of matching underwear in case I "got run over by a bus" - how pessimistic. Still, it worked because I've been wearing matching three part sets* ever since - no A&E orderly will be laughing at my choice of smalls any time soon.
The only problem is that it is £40. All I can hope is that either I get rich, and quick! Or that some turn up in the sales and I can snaffle one in my size. For those who want a link, it's here. Maybe some-one important at M&S will take pity and send this Z-list non-celebrity a free sample? I should coco.
*Yes boys, that does mean the thing that holds up stockings.
Friday 5 November 2010
Do it in the trashcan, Earthman; this ship is brand new!
Last night Zoë went out to a NaNoWriMo meet in Manchester. The trip there was fraught with the usual public transport woes, but eventually she made it. I gather she had a good evening that culminated in hitting a bar for a few scoops with friends. Of course, that's where the troubles just got started.
She missed the last train home, after having not heard her phone ring five times from me over the previous three hours. So at 11:45pm I had to get dressed and head off into Manchester in the car to pick her up. At Victoria station she was waiting, looking a little worse for wear. Apparently there were three pints of Lager inside her on an empty stomach, and a packet of chips that had been a vain attempt to soak some of the booze up. It's probably as well she didn't make the train, as they would have most likely chucked her out after she turned all Technicolor yawn.
Instead the yawn occured on the A6. I do apologise to the rather startled dog walker (it's your own fault for being out past midnight in the pouring rain!) who probably got a splattering. They can rest easier knowing that the car came off worse. What didn't pebble dash the side ran down the door on the inside and over the seat. We stopped at a layby where I knew how drunk she was by the frequency of the apologies. I got her home though in the end.
This morning after a wipe over of the car, we were out to a house viewing. It did not go well, as Zoë was feeling really rotten. On the way there she was ill again, onto her lap and proceeded to spend a thoroughly miserable hour waiting in the car because it was probably best that she didn't come around two houses - I guess her heart wouldn't have been in it!
I've got her to bed, and all her clothes are in the wash. The car was a different matter, as try as I might I cannot fit it in Zannussi's finest. Stiff work with hot soapy water and a sponge seems to have taken care of it though.
I think it is safe to say that Zoë will be off the sauce for a while!
She missed the last train home, after having not heard her phone ring five times from me over the previous three hours. So at 11:45pm I had to get dressed and head off into Manchester in the car to pick her up. At Victoria station she was waiting, looking a little worse for wear. Apparently there were three pints of Lager inside her on an empty stomach, and a packet of chips that had been a vain attempt to soak some of the booze up. It's probably as well she didn't make the train, as they would have most likely chucked her out after she turned all Technicolor yawn.
Instead the yawn occured on the A6. I do apologise to the rather startled dog walker (it's your own fault for being out past midnight in the pouring rain!) who probably got a splattering. They can rest easier knowing that the car came off worse. What didn't pebble dash the side ran down the door on the inside and over the seat. We stopped at a layby where I knew how drunk she was by the frequency of the apologies. I got her home though in the end.
This morning after a wipe over of the car, we were out to a house viewing. It did not go well, as Zoë was feeling really rotten. On the way there she was ill again, onto her lap and proceeded to spend a thoroughly miserable hour waiting in the car because it was probably best that she didn't come around two houses - I guess her heart wouldn't have been in it!
I've got her to bed, and all her clothes are in the wash. The car was a different matter, as try as I might I cannot fit it in Zannussi's finest. Stiff work with hot soapy water and a sponge seems to have taken care of it though.
I think it is safe to say that Zoë will be off the sauce for a while!
Thursday 4 November 2010
NaNoWriMo?
I keep getting asked if I'm doing NaNoWriMo. For those who don't know, this is an 'event' that has been running for quite a few years where the object is to write 50,000 words in one month. Essentially, a short book. It is an event that grows in popularity every year, and can only be a good thing to encourage new writers.
I'm not doing it though. Before I start sounding like a sourpuss, the simple reason is that that is not how I write books. For me writing has to be organic, and setting rigid targets just does not fit with how I work. When I'm writing a book, I can often write up to 4,000 words a day. But I have to be inspired and have a project clearly worked out in my head to do that. For me, the writing is something I have to and do approach professionally. If I were to sit down this month and force out 50,000 words then the chances are that I know that it would not be something that was good or that I felt was worth revising. Maybe that does make me sound pretentious? But each person has their own approach to writing, and setting a target for one month of the year isn't my way.
Zoë, however, does NaNoWriMo every year; that train is never late! "Curse of the other world"has been her title for at least the last three years running, and she never seems to be happy with it. Each year she comes back and starts again from scratch. In Zoë's case, my advice would be (and I hope she does consider it) this: write. Keep writing. Don't get bogged down on any one bit. Even if there are parts that you feel are weak, keep going and revise it only when you have a first draft complete. After that you can come back and revise it.
Remember: no book is published as a first draft. They are all edited and go through rewrites to make it good, so you should not feel disappointed if there are bits of your first draft that you aren't happy with.
For the record, I did do NaNoWriMo one year. I just happened to be in the zone for that month so thought "what the hell". I can't for the life of me remember what it was I wrote though, but I think I was happy enough to keep working on it and subsequently edit it long after the month was over.
I'm not doing it though. Before I start sounding like a sourpuss, the simple reason is that that is not how I write books. For me writing has to be organic, and setting rigid targets just does not fit with how I work. When I'm writing a book, I can often write up to 4,000 words a day. But I have to be inspired and have a project clearly worked out in my head to do that. For me, the writing is something I have to and do approach professionally. If I were to sit down this month and force out 50,000 words then the chances are that I know that it would not be something that was good or that I felt was worth revising. Maybe that does make me sound pretentious? But each person has their own approach to writing, and setting a target for one month of the year isn't my way.
Zoë, however, does NaNoWriMo every year; that train is never late! "Curse of the other world"has been her title for at least the last three years running, and she never seems to be happy with it. Each year she comes back and starts again from scratch. In Zoë's case, my advice would be (and I hope she does consider it) this: write. Keep writing. Don't get bogged down on any one bit. Even if there are parts that you feel are weak, keep going and revise it only when you have a first draft complete. After that you can come back and revise it.
Remember: no book is published as a first draft. They are all edited and go through rewrites to make it good, so you should not feel disappointed if there are bits of your first draft that you aren't happy with.
For the record, I did do NaNoWriMo one year. I just happened to be in the zone for that month so thought "what the hell". I can't for the life of me remember what it was I wrote though, but I think I was happy enough to keep working on it and subsequently edit it long after the month was over.
Tuesday 2 November 2010
Vote in the NRM "Is your model the rail thing?" competition
My photographs of 'Grove street yard' have appeared on the NRM website here. They are set number 10 and you can vote for them by following the instructions at the bottom of the page, sending an email specifying that set as your favourite.
Of course, if you really like some of the others (and there are some astoundingly good pictures in the competition) then it would be morally wrong for me to urge you to blindly vote for me. However; don't ask, don't get.
In summery: Please vote for set #10!
Of course, if you really like some of the others (and there are some astoundingly good pictures in the competition) then it would be morally wrong for me to urge you to blindly vote for me. However; don't ask, don't get.
In summery: Please vote for set #10!
Monday 1 November 2010
All over the house revenge of the ironing board
I just love this comic! There's something about the script that Zoë and I came up with that pushes the ol' snort-coffee-through-nose laugh-o-matic button.
All over the house
All over the house
Tuesday 26 October 2010
All aboard the book signing express!
Waterstones at Bolton have confirmed dates as November the 13th. Being a little closer to Christmas, they are expecting beusiness to be quite brisk, so this is a good opportunity for me. I think there is another event on at the same time, but that will be, as I understand it, a children's book event.
Being within walking distance of Jenny towers, I'm looking forward to this one. It's running from around 11:00am through until 4:00pm, though as at Darlington I will start early if I get there early, and will keep going until people numbers thin out. I have no idea how many books to expect to shift. Tentatively I'm told the manager has been told to order an extra ten copies. I will, of course, take a box of books with me just in case as I found out at Darlington this can be invaluable when deliveries get delayed.
In other news, google-fu reveals that there appears to be an impact to the PR work. There's a ton of listings giving details about the book and signing events. Hopefully soon to join them are some features being run by a number of local papers. Momentum is building!
Being within walking distance of Jenny towers, I'm looking forward to this one. It's running from around 11:00am through until 4:00pm, though as at Darlington I will start early if I get there early, and will keep going until people numbers thin out. I have no idea how many books to expect to shift. Tentatively I'm told the manager has been told to order an extra ten copies. I will, of course, take a box of books with me just in case as I found out at Darlington this can be invaluable when deliveries get delayed.
In other news, google-fu reveals that there appears to be an impact to the PR work. There's a ton of listings giving details about the book and signing events. Hopefully soon to join them are some features being run by a number of local papers. Momentum is building!
Monday 25 October 2010
Bolton signing
Bolton Waterstones wants to book me for a signing event. Success breeds success? Dates to be confirmed.
Saturday 23 October 2010
After the event.
Today went really well! I think Michael Macintyre (who was doing a signing up the road in Newcastle) might have just beaten me on shifting paper, but I did all right.
One thing is for certain - it's tiring work signing books, smiling and chatting to the public. I think I did all right though :)
One thing is for certain - it's tiring work signing books, smiling and chatting to the public. I think I did all right though :)
Friday 22 October 2010
T-1
I'm in Durham, all ready for the signing at Waterstones in Darlington tomorrow. Today I was interviewed by a newspaper for a feature to be run in a couple of weeks time, and have discussed with Waterstones in Durham for arranging another signing in November.
One small snag is that I received an email today that supply of our books has been held up somewhere. It's a good job I have a case of 44 in the boot of my car! Well, I'm always well prepared.
One small snag is that I received an email today that supply of our books has been held up somewhere. It's a good job I have a case of 44 in the boot of my car! Well, I'm always well prepared.
Monday 18 October 2010
Press release for signing
The word is out there. Articles are starting to turn up advertising the imminant start (?) of the signing tour.
clicky link here
clicky link here
Sunday 17 October 2010
Back in stock for under a fiver.
'Bringing Home the Stars' is back in stock at the Book Depository. They are currently offering it at under a fiver! I can't say cheaper than that.
Signed for you.
'Bringing home the stars' is doing well at the moment. There's a number of signing events confirmed coming up, with the first one in Darlington Waterstones on the 23rd of this month. It would be great to meet some of you, and you can come and meet me, talk to me about the book, shopping, or why belly button fluff is grey no matter what colour clothes you have been wearing. Why is that?
It's also still available through the website for those of you who cannot make it, or prefer to do your shopping online. Remember that you can request a signed copy through this method - just add a request for a signed copy through the appropriate box for sending a message to seller within the Paypal checkout process. If you want a more personalised message, than spell out exactly what you want to appear in the book. It's simple!
I look forward to signing some books, and have my best Parker pen on standby.
It's also still available through the website for those of you who cannot make it, or prefer to do your shopping online. Remember that you can request a signed copy through this method - just add a request for a signed copy through the appropriate box for sending a message to seller within the Paypal checkout process. If you want a more personalised message, than spell out exactly what you want to appear in the book. It's simple!
I look forward to signing some books, and have my best Parker pen on standby.
Tuesday 12 October 2010
On the shelves in Sweetens - buy it now!
It has been a busy day here at Jenny Towers promoting 'Bringing home the stars'. Sales are coming in, but it is always good to have more. So I've been helping to produce copy for proposed features in several local newspapers. At last count there are five that All Mouse Media have approached, and these all centre around the local areas where branches of Waterstones have booked me for in-store author events (to you and me this means signings, so I'm told!).
We've also had a lot of posters printed up by a local printing firm. They look really good and we've already sent out a few to Waterstones branches in preparation for the events. We also dropped off one at the local independent bookshop, Sweetens, who have been very supportive of 'Bringing home the stars'. It was gratifying to see that they already had some of the advance information cards up advertising it as 'in stock now!'.
If anyone is in the Bolton area and is considering buying a copy, can I urge you to head down to Sweetens and get a copy there? They've been a great help to us, and I'd like to be able to return the favour in any way I can.
Remember kids: support your local author, publisher and book retailer by buying a copy in person at Sweetens in Bolton!
We've also had a lot of posters printed up by a local printing firm. They look really good and we've already sent out a few to Waterstones branches in preparation for the events. We also dropped off one at the local independent bookshop, Sweetens, who have been very supportive of 'Bringing home the stars'. It was gratifying to see that they already had some of the advance information cards up advertising it as 'in stock now!'.
If anyone is in the Bolton area and is considering buying a copy, can I urge you to head down to Sweetens and get a copy there? They've been a great help to us, and I'd like to be able to return the favour in any way I can.
Remember kids: support your local author, publisher and book retailer by buying a copy in person at Sweetens in Bolton!
Monday 11 October 2010
Stalked by stockings and debt busters
I'm being stalked on the internet by adverts for various items of lingerie and hosiery. Help! I only looked at the basques at John Lewis' once! I've tried clearing my internet browser's cache to no avail. As for the debt buster ads, I have no idea - those really are a complete mystery. Maybe the internet thinks that I bankrupted myself by buying too many pairs of 10 denier ladder-resist stockings?
On the plus side, I suppose there could be worse adverts to be stalked by on the internet. Just be glad that I don't have the internet browsing habits of a 16 year old boy...
On the plus side, I suppose there could be worse adverts to be stalked by on the internet. Just be glad that I don't have the internet browsing habits of a 16 year old boy...
Can it really sell 1,000 copies just like that?
Last week was the best week so far for sales. A well-established author with a big publisher would certainly scoff at the figures, but they were good enough for me, reaching double figures off one order alone. If that happens every week, then it can't all be bad. Book orders come from Nielson Book Data once a week. They lump them all together and send them out reaching the publisher (all going well if there is no postal delay) around Thursday/Friday each week. Hopefully these are then filled and despatched by the weekend. It does all feel fast and famine though after the weekend, with nothing but the thankless task of promotion until the next eagerly awaited orders when either a celebratory drink or a session of drowning sorrows (only one bottle of Scotch required for either) can take place.
These days any book can appear (and will do) in every retailer's searchable catalogue listing. An ISBN assures this. Some people may marvel at the idea that this is all it takes to nominally appear in Amazon's, WH Smith's or Waterstones' catalogues. But that's where the fun stops. Being in a catalogue doesn't equate to being on the shelves ready to buy. How many books have you ordered that weren't immediately available? I have only a few and I'm guessing most other people are the same or even less so.
So how did 'Bringing home the stars' end up on retailers' shelves? A lot of hard work behind the scenes sending out review copies, arranging interviews, signings and readings and - probably the most important - sending out literally hundreds of book advance information sheets. Having a product isn't good enough if people don't know that it exists. I reckon from a hundred mail outs and quite a few follow-ups it maybe enthuses maybe half a dozen stores to actually stock copies. That's quite depressing. Remember too that even being on a shelf doesn't yet mean a sale because of that ol' chestnut of sale-or-return. SoR means that the publisher is lending a copy or copies to a store until such time as it is sold. Who is to say that all those ordered copies aren't going to filter back like a bad penny boomeranging their unwelcome return in six months time? We like to think that that won't happen though, and in most cases it won't because shops don't order hundreds of copies to litter their shelves and stock rooms if they don't think it will sell.
I've seen people ask about the problems of small presses. All Mouse Media certainly is a small press - let's have no illusions. That means that when a review copy plants its way down onto a reviewer's desk, it doesn't have the clout of a big-name tome from HarperCollins or Gollancz. Instead, it shuffles to the back of the queue as reviewers prioritise their time, and decide what books may or may not interest their audience anyway. Small presses lose out here, as they haven’t yet got that clout. That’s where being a trailblazer can be really hard work because you have to make that name the hard way. A big publisher established that credibility a long time ago, so don’t need to.
Book readings and signings help a lot. I’ve been booked for some branches of Waterstones as well as an indie shop or two. I’m still dreading the first of these – will I be sat there like a billy-no-mates as people pass on by deciding against having a copy of my book with the author’s squiggle in the front. Hey, if they want an unadulterated copy I’m fine with that.
Sales come from the places you don’t anticipate. I have to admit that I thought as a first timer with a small press that most of the sales would come from dedicated people wanting to check out a bit of indie sci-fi and ordering it through All Mouse Media’s website. Not so. Ironically, it seems that Waterstones is the biggest market. Whether that will continue to be the biggest market, only time will tell.
I tried self-publishing (NOT, I may point out, vanity press) before. It’s a thankless avenue dogged with prejudice as people assume that your book wasn’t good enough for mainstream publishing. There are quite a few books that started out this way, then got picked up by the mainstream later on. I wish I was one of them, but I wasn’t. It’s a competitive market battling against stigma, and for the most part losing. That’s why I was glad that All Mouse Media took me on, even if it does feel only a small mini stepette up from self-publishing. No matter how successful this book is, it still feels like cheating at school sports day. I guess I’ll never evade that feeling, no matter how hard I work at it.
The plan always was to prove the market for ’Bringing home the stars’ then see if a larger publisher would pick it up for the next edition. I’ve been told that this can happen, but it all hinges on a load of ‘if’s ‘but’s and ‘maybe’s. Some first-time novelists with major publishers actually can get only 400 sales off a first hardback. Some score as low as 200 copies. I haven’t seen any figures for paperbacks, but I’m guessing that 1,000 might be a usual figure to aim for. That’s a big target to hit, and I’m not sure how good a shot I am. Time will tell, but it is bloody stressful, I’ll tell you!
These days any book can appear (and will do) in every retailer's searchable catalogue listing. An ISBN assures this. Some people may marvel at the idea that this is all it takes to nominally appear in Amazon's, WH Smith's or Waterstones' catalogues. But that's where the fun stops. Being in a catalogue doesn't equate to being on the shelves ready to buy. How many books have you ordered that weren't immediately available? I have only a few and I'm guessing most other people are the same or even less so.
So how did 'Bringing home the stars' end up on retailers' shelves? A lot of hard work behind the scenes sending out review copies, arranging interviews, signings and readings and - probably the most important - sending out literally hundreds of book advance information sheets. Having a product isn't good enough if people don't know that it exists. I reckon from a hundred mail outs and quite a few follow-ups it maybe enthuses maybe half a dozen stores to actually stock copies. That's quite depressing. Remember too that even being on a shelf doesn't yet mean a sale because of that ol' chestnut of sale-or-return. SoR means that the publisher is lending a copy or copies to a store until such time as it is sold. Who is to say that all those ordered copies aren't going to filter back like a bad penny boomeranging their unwelcome return in six months time? We like to think that that won't happen though, and in most cases it won't because shops don't order hundreds of copies to litter their shelves and stock rooms if they don't think it will sell.
I've seen people ask about the problems of small presses. All Mouse Media certainly is a small press - let's have no illusions. That means that when a review copy plants its way down onto a reviewer's desk, it doesn't have the clout of a big-name tome from HarperCollins or Gollancz. Instead, it shuffles to the back of the queue as reviewers prioritise their time, and decide what books may or may not interest their audience anyway. Small presses lose out here, as they haven’t yet got that clout. That’s where being a trailblazer can be really hard work because you have to make that name the hard way. A big publisher established that credibility a long time ago, so don’t need to.
Book readings and signings help a lot. I’ve been booked for some branches of Waterstones as well as an indie shop or two. I’m still dreading the first of these – will I be sat there like a billy-no-mates as people pass on by deciding against having a copy of my book with the author’s squiggle in the front. Hey, if they want an unadulterated copy I’m fine with that.
Sales come from the places you don’t anticipate. I have to admit that I thought as a first timer with a small press that most of the sales would come from dedicated people wanting to check out a bit of indie sci-fi and ordering it through All Mouse Media’s website. Not so. Ironically, it seems that Waterstones is the biggest market. Whether that will continue to be the biggest market, only time will tell.
I tried self-publishing (NOT, I may point out, vanity press) before. It’s a thankless avenue dogged with prejudice as people assume that your book wasn’t good enough for mainstream publishing. There are quite a few books that started out this way, then got picked up by the mainstream later on. I wish I was one of them, but I wasn’t. It’s a competitive market battling against stigma, and for the most part losing. That’s why I was glad that All Mouse Media took me on, even if it does feel only a small mini stepette up from self-publishing. No matter how successful this book is, it still feels like cheating at school sports day. I guess I’ll never evade that feeling, no matter how hard I work at it.
The plan always was to prove the market for ’Bringing home the stars’ then see if a larger publisher would pick it up for the next edition. I’ve been told that this can happen, but it all hinges on a load of ‘if’s ‘but’s and ‘maybe’s. Some first-time novelists with major publishers actually can get only 400 sales off a first hardback. Some score as low as 200 copies. I haven’t seen any figures for paperbacks, but I’m guessing that 1,000 might be a usual figure to aim for. That’s a big target to hit, and I’m not sure how good a shot I am. Time will tell, but it is bloody stressful, I’ll tell you!
Monday 4 October 2010
Progress?
Sales are coming in through All Mouse Media's website, but painfully slowly. It is slightly annoying that it seems so many of the people who were so supportive when its publication was announced and promised they would support it, quietly decided not to.
We're also beset by the plague of people who promise to get back to you, then don't. Retailers, newspapers, co-ordinatoers, advertisers, banks, you name it they all do it. It isn't that I'm just the unpopular kid that smells and no-one likes (though sometimes I feel like it) because so many people I know say much the same. If some-one says "I'll call you back" it is, nine times out of ten, not true because they never do.
We knew from the outset that just having the greatest sci-fi/horror book wasn't enough. No-one will buy your product, no matter how great, if they don't know it exists. So AMM put a lot of money into printing up and sending out advance information sheets. So far to over 100 retailers or branches of chains. How many people responded? Three. I wouldn't mind so much, but we learnt today in one shop that the manager had not seen either this information, or the follow up left in person. It would seem that their staff are just binning advance information. How frustrating is that?
There's advertising too. Another chunk went live today, to add to a swathe of advertising that started a couple of weeks before the launch. It's an expensive business, and in truth I have a fear that so much advertising is wasted. Smooth-talking ad reps will feed the BS about how great their outlet is. But if it doesn't generate sales, then they were just taking the money and running.
We're also beset by the plague of people who promise to get back to you, then don't. Retailers, newspapers, co-ordinatoers, advertisers, banks, you name it they all do it. It isn't that I'm just the unpopular kid that smells and no-one likes (though sometimes I feel like it) because so many people I know say much the same. If some-one says "I'll call you back" it is, nine times out of ten, not true because they never do.
We knew from the outset that just having the greatest sci-fi/horror book wasn't enough. No-one will buy your product, no matter how great, if they don't know it exists. So AMM put a lot of money into printing up and sending out advance information sheets. So far to over 100 retailers or branches of chains. How many people responded? Three. I wouldn't mind so much, but we learnt today in one shop that the manager had not seen either this information, or the follow up left in person. It would seem that their staff are just binning advance information. How frustrating is that?
There's advertising too. Another chunk went live today, to add to a swathe of advertising that started a couple of weeks before the launch. It's an expensive business, and in truth I have a fear that so much advertising is wasted. Smooth-talking ad reps will feed the BS about how great their outlet is. But if it doesn't generate sales, then they were just taking the money and running.
Sunday 3 October 2010
Saturday 2 October 2010
Book launch day!
Today has finally come, in the form of the official release date of 'Bringing home the stars'. We've been shipping preorders for about three weeks, and there was no hard and fast rule about retailers holding them back until today (why should we?) so some people will have already got a copy and read it.
So from today it is a good opportunity to get buying. It is available from all the usual retailers, a lot of indie bookstores and branches of Waterstones. Currently I've been recomending the book depository though (hopefully a sign of demand) they're currently out of stock.
So a big thank you to all those who have purchased a copy so far as you're helping a wonderful indie author (me) and an indie publisher (All Mouse Media) to make headroads into a publishing world otherwise dominated by a small minority. If you haven't bought a copy yet, then why not? It's the best fiction book that has been released certainly today and maybe all year* and you will not regret getting a copy to read and enjoy.
BUY! BUY! BUY!
*contents may be an exageration
So from today it is a good opportunity to get buying. It is available from all the usual retailers, a lot of indie bookstores and branches of Waterstones. Currently I've been recomending the book depository though (hopefully a sign of demand) they're currently out of stock.
So a big thank you to all those who have purchased a copy so far as you're helping a wonderful indie author (me) and an indie publisher (All Mouse Media) to make headroads into a publishing world otherwise dominated by a small minority. If you haven't bought a copy yet, then why not? It's the best fiction book that has been released certainly today and maybe all year* and you will not regret getting a copy to read and enjoy.
BUY! BUY! BUY!
*contents may be an exageration
Tuesday 28 September 2010
Adventures in book publishing.
It's been an interesting, if hectic few weeks. Most of my time has been absorbed in the task of promoting 'Bringing home the stars' and getting it noticed by the important people to get it noticed by (i.e: book retailers). For a long time I've described this as a thankless task, and it can often feel that way when no response seems to be generated by contacting nearly a hundred retailers across the country.
Now that we get within spitting distance of the launch (2nd of October) all that work is paying off. Whilst the book buyer at Waterstones decided against a general stocking of it, under the explanation that it would just get lost under the big-name promotions leading up to Christmas, that wasn't a big setback that it may have first appeared. It wasn't Waterstones saying "Don't darken our door" but simply that a new book from a new author and a new publisher is a big risk in a time when there is a frenzy from the big hitters to get paper on the shelves for the Christmas present buying time. Waterstones stores are free to order it if local managers see a demand for it. The door is still ajar for the book buyer to reconsider at a later date, dependant on sales.
Those sales are coming. Already there have been three weeks' worth of pre-orders - a lot of them from Waterstones stores. Today has turned up yet more fruit of hard labour. Namely that bookings have started to come in for book readings/signings at Waterstones stores.
Waterstones has promotions managers for all of its stores, and it seems that a lot of them are quite keen for personal appearances by authors. Provisionally we have been booked today for Waterstones Manchester Deansgate (9th of December) and Waterstones Darlington (23rd of October). That's not bad follow up for contact made two days ago. Hopefully there will be more bookings over the next few days, and that is excellent news!
On top of that the promotions department at All Mouse Media (the publisher) is working hard to secure newspaper features about me and my work. They say that it doesn't matter how good a product is if no-one knows about it to buy it. The last week has shown that hard work can be rewarded in publishing to get a great product noticed.
There are still plenty of stocks in the warehouse, but they are moving. Nielson orders come through once a week on a Thursday usually for All Mouse Media so I'm interested (and a little nervous it has to be said) about what this Thursday brings after this week's push. Tomorrow is another hard at work day, with some more stores to contact to try and put together a 'grand tour' for me as an author. This looks like - all going well - it will cover Manchester, the North West, and up through County Durham. For those in the south it's more awkward because of travelling costs, but if they come in I'm prepared to do them. Why? Because any author would be stupid to neglect important exposure, especially when down here near the bottom of the ladder.
Publishers (and agents) like authors who are prepared to put the work in to promote their work and help it in every way to get out there and sell. I think it is safe to say that no agent or publisher could look at me and say "She doesn't do enough to promote her work." Judging by the last few weeks, I've certainly done as much as anyone else, if not more.
Here's to the next few weeks and hopefully finding out just how much the buying public feel about 'Bringing home the stars'. If the support I've received so far is anything to go by, it looks like we're onto the winner that Zoë predicted when she read the manuscript nearly a year ago!
Now that we get within spitting distance of the launch (2nd of October) all that work is paying off. Whilst the book buyer at Waterstones decided against a general stocking of it, under the explanation that it would just get lost under the big-name promotions leading up to Christmas, that wasn't a big setback that it may have first appeared. It wasn't Waterstones saying "Don't darken our door" but simply that a new book from a new author and a new publisher is a big risk in a time when there is a frenzy from the big hitters to get paper on the shelves for the Christmas present buying time. Waterstones stores are free to order it if local managers see a demand for it. The door is still ajar for the book buyer to reconsider at a later date, dependant on sales.
Those sales are coming. Already there have been three weeks' worth of pre-orders - a lot of them from Waterstones stores. Today has turned up yet more fruit of hard labour. Namely that bookings have started to come in for book readings/signings at Waterstones stores.
Waterstones has promotions managers for all of its stores, and it seems that a lot of them are quite keen for personal appearances by authors. Provisionally we have been booked today for Waterstones Manchester Deansgate (9th of December) and Waterstones Darlington (23rd of October). That's not bad follow up for contact made two days ago. Hopefully there will be more bookings over the next few days, and that is excellent news!
On top of that the promotions department at All Mouse Media (the publisher) is working hard to secure newspaper features about me and my work. They say that it doesn't matter how good a product is if no-one knows about it to buy it. The last week has shown that hard work can be rewarded in publishing to get a great product noticed.
There are still plenty of stocks in the warehouse, but they are moving. Nielson orders come through once a week on a Thursday usually for All Mouse Media so I'm interested (and a little nervous it has to be said) about what this Thursday brings after this week's push. Tomorrow is another hard at work day, with some more stores to contact to try and put together a 'grand tour' for me as an author. This looks like - all going well - it will cover Manchester, the North West, and up through County Durham. For those in the south it's more awkward because of travelling costs, but if they come in I'm prepared to do them. Why? Because any author would be stupid to neglect important exposure, especially when down here near the bottom of the ladder.
Publishers (and agents) like authors who are prepared to put the work in to promote their work and help it in every way to get out there and sell. I think it is safe to say that no agent or publisher could look at me and say "She doesn't do enough to promote her work." Judging by the last few weeks, I've certainly done as much as anyone else, if not more.
Here's to the next few weeks and hopefully finding out just how much the buying public feel about 'Bringing home the stars'. If the support I've received so far is anything to go by, it looks like we're onto the winner that Zoë predicted when she read the manuscript nearly a year ago!
Monday 27 September 2010
shunting on 'Grove Street yard' 2
A second video from the weekend. The layout is the one featured in 'Model Rail' issue 143.
Shunting on 'Grove Street Yard'
From this weekend just gone, when I took my train porn little layout out on tour for the first time.
Thursday 23 September 2010
One great day.
Got one bookstore to enthusiastically stock it. Have three other chains interested pending approval of various people. Got home to more preorders from both Waterstones and Amazon. I think the phrase is "Excellent!" said in the most Mr Burns possible way.
Monday 20 September 2010
Creepy adverts.
In the strangest of strange stalking ways I seem to be followed around on the internet by adverts for lingerie at John Lewis'. I suspect it has a lot to do with cookies, and the fact that a couple of days ago I was buying a present for some-one through their wedding list at John Lewis and happened to go browsing around. One of the items that I looked at was a pretty basque set.
Now no matter where I go, the adverts that would appear on those sites are for that damn basque! It's the same picture too. I suppose it says a lot about the way that internet browsers work and the way in which they store details that the average person isn't aware of. I know it is possible to get add-blocking software. But here's the dilemma: adverts pay for a lot of stuff on the internet. Life isn't free, and you appear to get some things for free on the internet because of the adverts that adorn the sites. Webcomics, and the two I contribute to in particular, fall into this category. When people roam in with add-blocking software, they don't see the adverts and we don't get any revenue. We aren't a charity, but some people do seem to think they can take all the time without paying.
Some sites really are in your face with adverts, so I can sympathise with why some people feel obliged to use blocking software. I really hate those sites where hovering adverts float around when you scroll and get in your way. It's sites like these that give the rest of us a bad name, and make it harder for people to make a living from online sites that provide content for free.
Just a thought. Now will that pretty basque STOP FOLLOWING ME AROUND PLEASE! It's a good job that I don't browse adult stuff - who knows what adverts would follow me around like some ruthless S&M stalker on the internet.
Now no matter where I go, the adverts that would appear on those sites are for that damn basque! It's the same picture too. I suppose it says a lot about the way that internet browsers work and the way in which they store details that the average person isn't aware of. I know it is possible to get add-blocking software. But here's the dilemma: adverts pay for a lot of stuff on the internet. Life isn't free, and you appear to get some things for free on the internet because of the adverts that adorn the sites. Webcomics, and the two I contribute to in particular, fall into this category. When people roam in with add-blocking software, they don't see the adverts and we don't get any revenue. We aren't a charity, but some people do seem to think they can take all the time without paying.
Some sites really are in your face with adverts, so I can sympathise with why some people feel obliged to use blocking software. I really hate those sites where hovering adverts float around when you scroll and get in your way. It's sites like these that give the rest of us a bad name, and make it harder for people to make a living from online sites that provide content for free.
Just a thought. Now will that pretty basque STOP FOLLOWING ME AROUND PLEASE! It's a good job that I don't browse adult stuff - who knows what adverts would follow me around like some ruthless S&M stalker on the internet.
All over the house » Archive » Fancy dress
One of my favourite strips so far. Talk like a pirate? "You want copied DVD?"
All over the house » Archive » Fancy dress
All over the house » Archive » Fancy dress
Sunday 19 September 2010
Talking like a pirate in a comic.
Today is international talk like a pirate day. I don't think it is an officially sanctioned event though. Nonetheless, today I shall mostly be talking like Captain L. Jackson: "Yaaaarg motherf****r! Get in the motherf***ing boat! What are these snakes doing on ma damn boat!" It has, however, led to much debate over the years at Jenny towers as to how modern pirates might talk. Actual concensus seems to be that a modern day pirate might be dressed somewhat differently and say something along the lines of "you want a copied DVD? Nice price!" Monday's 'All Over the house' comic strip explores this a little; it's an idea we've had floating around for a while.
We've been doing a lot of comics of late because 'All over the house went five days a week from three a few weeks ago. It has seen the viewing figures nearly quadruple, which is good. The golden rule - so I'm told - of setting a comic scedule is make sure that you don't miss any updates. We had a buffer, but Zoë's assignment earlier this week used that up. It wasn't a big buffer after all. So today she will be drawing all five of next week's comics.
We've been doing a lot of comics of late because 'All over the house went five days a week from three a few weeks ago. It has seen the viewing figures nearly quadruple, which is good. The golden rule - so I'm told - of setting a comic scedule is make sure that you don't miss any updates. We had a buffer, but Zoë's assignment earlier this week used that up. It wasn't a big buffer after all. So today she will be drawing all five of next week's comics.
Friday 17 September 2010
State of the Jenny today.
I got a telephone call this afternoon to let me know that more pre orders have arrived. I'm keeping a tally now though it is still daunting how many are still to go to the target of 1,000 sales. Every little helps. I also hope that these aren't orders that will come back making use of the sale-or-return facility. It's still a very nervous time for an author, and for the people who've put up the money to get this behemoth on the road.
I've been distracting myself when I can by doing a new draft of an old book. I always liked the story that was in 'The Atlantic collection'; in some ways it is my favourite book. The only trouble is that I felt a little embaressed about the standards of the writing given how much I've moved on over the last couple of years. So I'm doing a new edition. Not because anyone's asked me to, but because I want to. Some parts aren't needing much, but others are getting rewritten.
This week's other distraction has been Bosun #3 out in the back garden. When I set out to buy one of these I tried my hardest to get one with a sound transom, as a rotton core is the Achilles heel of this type of boat. Unfortunately, what I got was a boat that had had transom rot bodged and hurriedly hidden. It isn't a disaster, but I've slowly been putting what I've found right. I took the opertunity to strip the horrible household emulsion off the transom and sand and repait with proper yachting enamel after effecting a few repairs. One of the first things I noticed when the paint was coming off were some red letters on the original fibreglass surface. On closer examination they spelt out: "The New BOSUN" in stencilled red letters. This confirms what I already knew that this had been a demonstrator for the builders (along with around fifteen other boats) and was used to secure a contract for several thousand of the craft over the years with the Royal Navy and other organisation.
Right now I'm listening to the song 'Happiness' by Goldfrapp. I'm hoping that the Karma is justified after learning of the pre orders. Fingers crossed for the future (and buy my book!)
I've been distracting myself when I can by doing a new draft of an old book. I always liked the story that was in 'The Atlantic collection'; in some ways it is my favourite book. The only trouble is that I felt a little embaressed about the standards of the writing given how much I've moved on over the last couple of years. So I'm doing a new edition. Not because anyone's asked me to, but because I want to. Some parts aren't needing much, but others are getting rewritten.
This week's other distraction has been Bosun #3 out in the back garden. When I set out to buy one of these I tried my hardest to get one with a sound transom, as a rotton core is the Achilles heel of this type of boat. Unfortunately, what I got was a boat that had had transom rot bodged and hurriedly hidden. It isn't a disaster, but I've slowly been putting what I've found right. I took the opertunity to strip the horrible household emulsion off the transom and sand and repait with proper yachting enamel after effecting a few repairs. One of the first things I noticed when the paint was coming off were some red letters on the original fibreglass surface. On closer examination they spelt out: "The New BOSUN" in stencilled red letters. This confirms what I already knew that this had been a demonstrator for the builders (along with around fifteen other boats) and was used to secure a contract for several thousand of the craft over the years with the Royal Navy and other organisation.
Right now I'm listening to the song 'Happiness' by Goldfrapp. I'm hoping that the Karma is justified after learning of the pre orders. Fingers crossed for the future (and buy my book!)
The banking aftermath.
Some may have remembered the calamity that occured when a chas machine in North Wales ate my debit card without warning. Just for a little closure, HSBC got back to me apologising for the way I was treated, and placed an amount of cash into my account as a way of saying sorry. Apology accepted, and it makes me feel that I bank with a bank that isn't just a faceless hard-ass entity.
RBS, on the other hand, wrote to say that I had been given duff information by their telephone operative, but refused to apologise. They also claimed that their cash machine could not have crashed in the manner described, and the only way it would retain my card was if HSBC had requested it to. All-in-all the biggest sack of BS you can imagine.
Needless to say, I'm happy with my bank, but have simply been reappraised of all the reasons and then some that I closed my RBS account in 1999. I'm so glad I don't have to deal with them on a daily basis.
RBS, on the other hand, wrote to say that I had been given duff information by their telephone operative, but refused to apologise. They also claimed that their cash machine could not have crashed in the manner described, and the only way it would retain my card was if HSBC had requested it to. All-in-all the biggest sack of BS you can imagine.
Needless to say, I'm happy with my bank, but have simply been reappraised of all the reasons and then some that I closed my RBS account in 1999. I'm so glad I don't have to deal with them on a daily basis.
Monday 13 September 2010
The book comes ever closer to the shelves.
I've spent the last few days helping to mail out Advance Information sheets to branches of Foyles and Waterstones. It's hard work, not least because I've had to transcribe address from an excell spreadsheet into letters one at a time, print, then combine with the Advance sheets and hand address every envelope. There's over 300 branches of Waterstones alone, so that gives you an idea at how longwinded the process actually is. I've also submitted searchable listing information to Amazon and requested that they consider a Kindle edition of the book too.
It is mentally exhausting work. Meanwhile, discounting deals are still in the negotiating stage, so watch this space (or, more importantly, watch Waterstones and Amazon's spaces for discount deals to appear). More importantly, the first advance orders are trickling in. It's all good, even if it feels like a thankless task at this stage. Roll on the 2nd of October and the offial release!
It is mentally exhausting work. Meanwhile, discounting deals are still in the negotiating stage, so watch this space (or, more importantly, watch Waterstones and Amazon's spaces for discount deals to appear). More importantly, the first advance orders are trickling in. It's all good, even if it feels like a thankless task at this stage. Roll on the 2nd of October and the offial release!
Sunday 12 September 2010
Jenny and Zoë at the Weekend: 4 - Music and Manners
Meanwhile, back on the radio....
Jenny and Zoë at the Weekend: 4 - Music and Manners: "This week, Jenny and Zoë talk about manners, drunk people, employment and why the minimum wage is necessary, before doing a handbrake turn ..."
Jenny and Zoë at the Weekend: 4 - Music and Manners: "This week, Jenny and Zoë talk about manners, drunk people, employment and why the minimum wage is necessary, before doing a handbrake turn ..."
Wednesday 8 September 2010
I got mugged in memory lane.
Last night I decided to sit in the lounge and have a listen to some of the 12" single section of my record collection. It's a big section, and a lot of it is stuff I used to use when mixing dance music. It's been a while, and it is probably quite telling that most of the 12" singles are from the period 1996-2000. What can I say - I was big on dance music at the time. Actually everyone knows that dance music attained perfection in the Autumn of 1999. Everything since has pretty much been a pale immitation, rehash or outright rip-off of something that went before.
Maybe it is just a sign of getting old? Wah! I don't want to be old!
There were quite a few white label promos from my time DJing and radio presenting. Positiva is a label that came up again and again. I found some of the singles that I used to use in my set when playing gigs, and it's strange to hear them unmixed after so many years. I have a recording on CD of one of the last events I played, and it is the mixed version of my set over an hour. The Gods of the turntables were shining that night, and I did very well even by my standards. Is it blowing my own trumpet too much to admit that I have occasionally listened to that mix CD over the last nine years?
The unmixed tunes sound, well, odd to say the least. On the set there was one mix that comprised crossfading between three records over the space of several minutes so that at no time were less than two records playing at the same time. To listen to those records unmixed makes them sound strangely empty when you are used to hearing the mix.
I don't think I could still beatmix. I wasn't that great at it even back in the day, but I got by. For the last five years my two turntables have lived in seperate rooms plugged to a standard stereo amplifier for the purpose of listening to music rather than mixing it. I used to like complex mixing of two tunes, making the most of synthy bits to create more layers to an existing track. Some of the mixes I experimented with were quite different - the James Bond theme from "From Russia with love" mixed into Radio 7 by David Holmes so that the two play over each other for several minutes was one I can remember. I used to love experimenting with old LPs bought secondhand to add samples and vocals to underground dance classics. A part of me wonders if I should dust off my old sound mixer, move the two turntables back together and spin some tunes for the old times. Another part of me warns that I am unlikely to sound as good as I remember sounding.
Does dance music still come on 12" vinyl these days? Probably not as I haven't seen any on this format for a few years. In case there's any youngsters reading: I used to have to beatmix all my records the old-fashioned analogue way by fading between two records, matching the beats using only an adjustment of the speed the turntables were spinning at and my own ear. I used to use computers only to record the line out from sound systems. Even then, there wasn't much an old K6 300Mhz could do except record a *.wav file and later spend hours chopping it to tracks and burning it out at the lightning speed of 2x write to a CDr.
I work for a living these days. Actually, scrub that - I work for myself from home. Living the dream.
Maybe it is just a sign of getting old? Wah! I don't want to be old!
There were quite a few white label promos from my time DJing and radio presenting. Positiva is a label that came up again and again. I found some of the singles that I used to use in my set when playing gigs, and it's strange to hear them unmixed after so many years. I have a recording on CD of one of the last events I played, and it is the mixed version of my set over an hour. The Gods of the turntables were shining that night, and I did very well even by my standards. Is it blowing my own trumpet too much to admit that I have occasionally listened to that mix CD over the last nine years?
The unmixed tunes sound, well, odd to say the least. On the set there was one mix that comprised crossfading between three records over the space of several minutes so that at no time were less than two records playing at the same time. To listen to those records unmixed makes them sound strangely empty when you are used to hearing the mix.
I don't think I could still beatmix. I wasn't that great at it even back in the day, but I got by. For the last five years my two turntables have lived in seperate rooms plugged to a standard stereo amplifier for the purpose of listening to music rather than mixing it. I used to like complex mixing of two tunes, making the most of synthy bits to create more layers to an existing track. Some of the mixes I experimented with were quite different - the James Bond theme from "From Russia with love" mixed into Radio 7 by David Holmes so that the two play over each other for several minutes was one I can remember. I used to love experimenting with old LPs bought secondhand to add samples and vocals to underground dance classics. A part of me wonders if I should dust off my old sound mixer, move the two turntables back together and spin some tunes for the old times. Another part of me warns that I am unlikely to sound as good as I remember sounding.
Does dance music still come on 12" vinyl these days? Probably not as I haven't seen any on this format for a few years. In case there's any youngsters reading: I used to have to beatmix all my records the old-fashioned analogue way by fading between two records, matching the beats using only an adjustment of the speed the turntables were spinning at and my own ear. I used to use computers only to record the line out from sound systems. Even then, there wasn't much an old K6 300Mhz could do except record a *.wav file and later spend hours chopping it to tracks and burning it out at the lightning speed of 2x write to a CDr.
I work for a living these days. Actually, scrub that - I work for myself from home. Living the dream.
Monday 6 September 2010
Listing at SF Site
SF Site now lists 'Bringing home the stars' as forthcoming. Hopefully they are considering revuing it (they don't revue every book that they get sent). It's a good start though as there aren't actually that many new SF+F books released every month.
Find it about half way down in the right side column
Find it about half way down in the right side column
How hard can getting people to pay you less for your product actually be?
It's amazing how the busier I am the less time I have for blogging. Actually, scrub that: it isn't amazing at all when you think about it.
Most of my energies have been directed towards marketing, getting revues and negotiating deals for 'Bringing home the stars'. It's a never-ending treadmill that seems at this stage to have no rewards and no obvious affect on sales. There is a question that I keep asking myself, and it is: "when will the advance orders actually start to trickle through and be fulfilled?". I've been asking this for a while now, and in all honesty I just don't know. As a new publisher, All Mouse Media is treading this ground for the first time, having diversified away from online media. The truth is that no-one here knows exactly; it's a major learning curve for all concerned.
Revues and favourable quotes are trickling in. I alwasy thought that these would be a hard part, but careful work and networking (and downright cheek at times) has paid off. Now I'm left thinking that this may be, along with writing, editing and getting into print a book, the easy part. Selling the damn things is hard! The launch is less than a month away now; it soon comes around fast. We still have events to try and book at branches of Waterstones, but the bumf for these is somewhere between the printers and All Mouse Media Ltd's HQ. Until that arrives, it's a case of finger twiddling and trying not to drink too much tea and coffee. Sort of. Actually, there's still plenty of thankless tasks to do and they are getting done - slowly.
The two cartons of books for promotional purposes are slowly going down. The first one actually is almost empty and I can see the bottom. whether that is a good sign, I don't know. Lots of people seem to want free copies, but whether what they can offer in return will translate to sales I really do not know. We have had a few sales, but they aren't the landslide that would have cleaned out all the stock in the first week. We never expected that to happen though for a new company, unless we were incredibly lucky.
Personally, I want to see the book in Waterstones' 3 for 2 offer. Whether that can be negotiated is something that I'll find out over the next few days. An Amazon discount too is something I'd like to see, but as of today the price for pre-order there stubbornly remains at the full RRP. It is a minefield trying to track down the people who we need to talk to and actually talking to them, but we're getting there. It is not helped by the fact that a lot of companies in this area don't seem to like to let you know contact details for who you need to talk to. As a start, you just try and find the 0207 (London) number for Amazon listed on their website. I actually found it via a third party contact - is that really how companies like it? It does feel like bookselling is surrounded by some kind of cult of secrecy.
I think it was BR in the 1980s who used the slogan "We're getting there". Well, we are. Slowly.
Most of my energies have been directed towards marketing, getting revues and negotiating deals for 'Bringing home the stars'. It's a never-ending treadmill that seems at this stage to have no rewards and no obvious affect on sales. There is a question that I keep asking myself, and it is: "when will the advance orders actually start to trickle through and be fulfilled?". I've been asking this for a while now, and in all honesty I just don't know. As a new publisher, All Mouse Media is treading this ground for the first time, having diversified away from online media. The truth is that no-one here knows exactly; it's a major learning curve for all concerned.
Revues and favourable quotes are trickling in. I alwasy thought that these would be a hard part, but careful work and networking (and downright cheek at times) has paid off. Now I'm left thinking that this may be, along with writing, editing and getting into print a book, the easy part. Selling the damn things is hard! The launch is less than a month away now; it soon comes around fast. We still have events to try and book at branches of Waterstones, but the bumf for these is somewhere between the printers and All Mouse Media Ltd's HQ. Until that arrives, it's a case of finger twiddling and trying not to drink too much tea and coffee. Sort of. Actually, there's still plenty of thankless tasks to do and they are getting done - slowly.
The two cartons of books for promotional purposes are slowly going down. The first one actually is almost empty and I can see the bottom. whether that is a good sign, I don't know. Lots of people seem to want free copies, but whether what they can offer in return will translate to sales I really do not know. We have had a few sales, but they aren't the landslide that would have cleaned out all the stock in the first week. We never expected that to happen though for a new company, unless we were incredibly lucky.
Personally, I want to see the book in Waterstones' 3 for 2 offer. Whether that can be negotiated is something that I'll find out over the next few days. An Amazon discount too is something I'd like to see, but as of today the price for pre-order there stubbornly remains at the full RRP. It is a minefield trying to track down the people who we need to talk to and actually talking to them, but we're getting there. It is not helped by the fact that a lot of companies in this area don't seem to like to let you know contact details for who you need to talk to. As a start, you just try and find the 0207 (London) number for Amazon listed on their website. I actually found it via a third party contact - is that really how companies like it? It does feel like bookselling is surrounded by some kind of cult of secrecy.
I think it was BR in the 1980s who used the slogan "We're getting there". Well, we are. Slowly.
Sunday 29 August 2010
I need a holiday to recover from the holiday.
August turned out to be a busy month. So busy, in fact, I've only managed three nights in my own bed. Now, before you all start raising your eyebrows and doing Sid James impressions, it isn't what you think. The first trip away was a holiday in North Wales, staying in Harlech within thirty feet of the spot that Zoë and I had our honeymoon. We were with friends and managed to get the best of the weather (except for overnight rain on the final night7 which necessitated the evils of a wet pack of the caravan awning and annex). It was marred only by the swallowing whole without trace of my debit card by an ATM in Porthmadog (see previous ranting diatribe post). I still haven't heard back from either banks involved, so a letter may be sent next to the regulatory authority - the banks have been warned!
After that it was off to deepest, darkest Cumbria in the shadow of the shipyards (literally) in Barrow-in-Furness for a sailing trip. We didn't actually sail all that far, staying as we were at a Sea Cadet sailing centre within the shadow of three ships built for the Sultan of Brunei. It must be nice to be so rich that you can say: "Take these ships away and dispose of them, for I am bored with them now. Grey is so last year" and that is pretty much what he has done. A few hundred million squids of ships for sale for their scrap value. One careful owner, never raced or rallied and only ever put to sea once for trials.
The real reason for the trip wasn't to oggle some rich man's follies, but to teach children how to sail. Actually, my specialist area is pulling (for non-navy people read: rowing) and that's what I ended up doing. You get a lovely tan sat in a naval pulling boat through some of the sunniest weather I've seen this August. Unfortunately it manefests in a curious way, on account of me being sat on a stern bouyancy tank of an Admiralty Sailing Craft and my nose, cheeks, shoulders and knees are all sunburnt (though the rest of me managed to sustain only a light tan).
I've learnt a few things on this trip. Firstly, that a thirteen year old kid can produce a surprisingly large volume of vomit when they are ill in the night. I also learnt that other people's children quickly lose their gloss when you can't give them back for another week. On the Wednesday I reconnected with my hatred of modern sailing dinghies when I had a day free and went out on something called a 'Topper' It was more akin to sailing an ironing board with a dayglow orange sail. Oh for a proper boat, like the RMS Jennïkins that sat forlornly back in Bolton under a cover.
Getting back home yesterday proved to me that Zoë has money burning a hole in her pocket and without my stable influence, it tends to burn right through and drop into the outstretched hands of retailers. A jet black Xbox 360 has appeared to replace the old lump that was a plain Xbox. With it has come Halo 3, Grand Theft Auto 4 and Project Gothanm Racing 4. On top of that the digital box for the television now mysteriously allows me to watch far more channels than we got before on the free package. I'm just wondering what else came whilst I was away and managed to get well hidden from my prying eyes.
It's back to the grindstone for me here at Jenny towers, with books to write, two others to edit and some promotional material to go through for 'Bringing home the stars'. That's all on top of doing an imperial f**k-ton of laundry that seems to have accumulated a light dusting of sea salt. Why does it decide it must get on my shorts in interesting concentric circles at crotch level? Life's little mysteries...
After that it was off to deepest, darkest Cumbria in the shadow of the shipyards (literally) in Barrow-in-Furness for a sailing trip. We didn't actually sail all that far, staying as we were at a Sea Cadet sailing centre within the shadow of three ships built for the Sultan of Brunei. It must be nice to be so rich that you can say: "Take these ships away and dispose of them, for I am bored with them now. Grey is so last year" and that is pretty much what he has done. A few hundred million squids of ships for sale for their scrap value. One careful owner, never raced or rallied and only ever put to sea once for trials.
The real reason for the trip wasn't to oggle some rich man's follies, but to teach children how to sail. Actually, my specialist area is pulling (for non-navy people read: rowing) and that's what I ended up doing. You get a lovely tan sat in a naval pulling boat through some of the sunniest weather I've seen this August. Unfortunately it manefests in a curious way, on account of me being sat on a stern bouyancy tank of an Admiralty Sailing Craft and my nose, cheeks, shoulders and knees are all sunburnt (though the rest of me managed to sustain only a light tan).
I've learnt a few things on this trip. Firstly, that a thirteen year old kid can produce a surprisingly large volume of vomit when they are ill in the night. I also learnt that other people's children quickly lose their gloss when you can't give them back for another week. On the Wednesday I reconnected with my hatred of modern sailing dinghies when I had a day free and went out on something called a 'Topper' It was more akin to sailing an ironing board with a dayglow orange sail. Oh for a proper boat, like the RMS Jennïkins that sat forlornly back in Bolton under a cover.
Getting back home yesterday proved to me that Zoë has money burning a hole in her pocket and without my stable influence, it tends to burn right through and drop into the outstretched hands of retailers. A jet black Xbox 360 has appeared to replace the old lump that was a plain Xbox. With it has come Halo 3, Grand Theft Auto 4 and Project Gothanm Racing 4. On top of that the digital box for the television now mysteriously allows me to watch far more channels than we got before on the free package. I'm just wondering what else came whilst I was away and managed to get well hidden from my prying eyes.
It's back to the grindstone for me here at Jenny towers, with books to write, two others to edit and some promotional material to go through for 'Bringing home the stars'. That's all on top of doing an imperial f**k-ton of laundry that seems to have accumulated a light dusting of sea salt. Why does it decide it must get on my shorts in interesting concentric circles at crotch level? Life's little mysteries...
Thursday 19 August 2010
Feckless bankers - coming to a cash machine near you!
It is very easy to take some technology for granted. There was a time when an ATM machine was something evil that charged you for the privelage of withdrawing your own money just so that you could spend it. There was also a time when cash was King, and most shops would not accept debit cards. Things have changed, and this modern world that we nlive in now has both ATMs and debit cards as an everyday fact of life.
Of course sometimes Satan likes to do something nasty in your kettle of life. Last Saturday appeared to be my turn, as whilst on holiday the ATM at Porthmadog in Tesco's carpark did just that. It ate my debit card as I was trying to withdraw cash. The card wasn't flagged, and I wasn't trying to withdraw money that I didn't have or indeed anything else naughty like that. No, the machine just crashed and took my debit card with it. Whilst watching the tiny screen scroll through a Windows XP desktop, it was apparent that my card was not going to re-emerge. The machine belonged to Royal Bank of Scotland, though thoughtlessly they had failed to provide anywhere contact numbers in case of issues. How thoughtful of them.
The manager of the Tesco store was quite helpful, letting me use his phone to call RBS. It should have been simple, but it wasn't. RBS failed at every level to take the issue seriously. Their automated switchboard disconnected me twice before it even let me speak to a human. At least I assume she was human, though maybe it is a requirement of working Saturdays in an RBS call centre to be an unhelpful and obstinant idiot? Refusing to help at all, she instead spent ten minutes trying to lecture me on how it was their 'policy' to not return eaten cards, and instead have them destroyed. She would not even transfer me to some-one else or furnish me with any helpful numbers for perhaps contacting HSBC - my card provider.
Once again the manager was the only helpful person, finding a copy of the Yellow pages to get a number for HSBC and again letting me use his telephone to call them. HSBC (lovely 'Tom' - if that was his real name - sounding suspiciously like he was pulling a night shift in an Indian call centre) cancelled the card, and then promptly infomerd me that a replacement would be sent out 'within three to five working days'. Oh yes, nice one Tom. I just told you that I was 200 miles from home, on holiday, without any means to pay for anything else including the petrol required to get myself back that 200 miles to reach the replacement card, if it did indeed arrive. Apparently I was expected to scrounge from people any money I needed. Hey, cheers for ruining the rest of the holiday. I had £1.12 to my name, and only a cheque book that no-one would accept because cheques are so last decade don't-you-know and anyway the debit card was also the essential cheque guarentee card too.
It isn't nice having to ask friends to pay for things even as simple as a cup of tea or food. Getting them to fill your car with petrol too for good measure seems even more embarrassing and humiliating. Kiss goodbye to any daytrips because, you know, sponging for the price of a ride on the Ffestiniog railway seems a little too much to lay on the person you already begged £40 off for petrol.
So the modern world collapses faster than the operating system of an RBS cash machine. The nasty letters have been sent, outlining in advance that empty apologees without actual actions aren't acceptable. But you just know that the behemoths of the banking system aren't really interested. If it doesn't involve ripping us all off and making the world's economies collapse whilst paying mega-bonuses for irrisponsible financial risk taking, then they don't want to know.
As of yet, the promised replacement card hasn't arrived. Oh joy. It's particularly irritating because I'm off on a sailing expedition for a week and a bit on Saturday, so if it hasn't arrived by tomorrow then Satan will be laughing all the way to a second trip to that kettle.
Of course sometimes Satan likes to do something nasty in your kettle of life. Last Saturday appeared to be my turn, as whilst on holiday the ATM at Porthmadog in Tesco's carpark did just that. It ate my debit card as I was trying to withdraw cash. The card wasn't flagged, and I wasn't trying to withdraw money that I didn't have or indeed anything else naughty like that. No, the machine just crashed and took my debit card with it. Whilst watching the tiny screen scroll through a Windows XP desktop, it was apparent that my card was not going to re-emerge. The machine belonged to Royal Bank of Scotland, though thoughtlessly they had failed to provide anywhere contact numbers in case of issues. How thoughtful of them.
The manager of the Tesco store was quite helpful, letting me use his phone to call RBS. It should have been simple, but it wasn't. RBS failed at every level to take the issue seriously. Their automated switchboard disconnected me twice before it even let me speak to a human. At least I assume she was human, though maybe it is a requirement of working Saturdays in an RBS call centre to be an unhelpful and obstinant idiot? Refusing to help at all, she instead spent ten minutes trying to lecture me on how it was their 'policy' to not return eaten cards, and instead have them destroyed. She would not even transfer me to some-one else or furnish me with any helpful numbers for perhaps contacting HSBC - my card provider.
Once again the manager was the only helpful person, finding a copy of the Yellow pages to get a number for HSBC and again letting me use his telephone to call them. HSBC (lovely 'Tom' - if that was his real name - sounding suspiciously like he was pulling a night shift in an Indian call centre) cancelled the card, and then promptly infomerd me that a replacement would be sent out 'within three to five working days'. Oh yes, nice one Tom. I just told you that I was 200 miles from home, on holiday, without any means to pay for anything else including the petrol required to get myself back that 200 miles to reach the replacement card, if it did indeed arrive. Apparently I was expected to scrounge from people any money I needed. Hey, cheers for ruining the rest of the holiday. I had £1.12 to my name, and only a cheque book that no-one would accept because cheques are so last decade don't-you-know and anyway the debit card was also the essential cheque guarentee card too.
It isn't nice having to ask friends to pay for things even as simple as a cup of tea or food. Getting them to fill your car with petrol too for good measure seems even more embarrassing and humiliating. Kiss goodbye to any daytrips because, you know, sponging for the price of a ride on the Ffestiniog railway seems a little too much to lay on the person you already begged £40 off for petrol.
So the modern world collapses faster than the operating system of an RBS cash machine. The nasty letters have been sent, outlining in advance that empty apologees without actual actions aren't acceptable. But you just know that the behemoths of the banking system aren't really interested. If it doesn't involve ripping us all off and making the world's economies collapse whilst paying mega-bonuses for irrisponsible financial risk taking, then they don't want to know.
As of yet, the promised replacement card hasn't arrived. Oh joy. It's particularly irritating because I'm off on a sailing expedition for a week and a bit on Saturday, so if it hasn't arrived by tomorrow then Satan will be laughing all the way to a second trip to that kettle.
Monday 9 August 2010
That just takes the custard cream
Why is it that retailers wait until just after I have bought something to reduce the price and appear to be clearing out unsold stock? It's happened with no less than three items this week, and it is getting annoying. I can only think that retailers gauge the point at which they have sold all they can at full price by seeing what I am buying and adjusting straight after I have bought. Things that I haven't bought, even within the same set, invariably hold their price. It's bloody annoying.
I can only assume that either there is a conspiracy, or that I simply have unpopular tastes in books, software and other goods and have very bad luck when it comes to money. Rememeber folks: it isn't paranoia if they really are out to get you.
I can only assume that either there is a conspiracy, or that I simply have unpopular tastes in books, software and other goods and have very bad luck when it comes to money. Rememeber folks: it isn't paranoia if they really are out to get you.
Have tastes changed so much?
I've been trying to read a book called The Dispossessed by Ursula Le Guin. It's part of a large set of 73 that I have published by Gollancz called SF Masterworks. A lot of the books in this set were published originally from the 1950s to the 1980s with a big emphasis on 1960/70s. There are, it has to be said, some real gems in this set. On the other hand, there are some real lemons too. I'm afraid that The Dispossessed probably falls into the lemon category from what I have read.
The book failed to grab me; I did try and persist. Longwinded and without any real point, the first two chapters failed in any way to give me a story or characters that I could latch onto and feel for and get into. Actually, come to think of it, there seemed very little point to what I read. When I first began writing, wordy, self-indulgent stuff was referred to as 'Purple prose' and was to be avoided at all cost. Unfortunately, Le Guin didn't go to that lecture when she wrote this. She isn't alone though; even Arthur C. Clarke's early works had a habit of falling into this trap. I am forced to conclude given the rave reviews this book had that tastes have changed, and some books have not aged well.
In some respects, the 1960/70s were the years to be trying to get published if you wrote sci-fi. Stick a rocket on the cover and you could be forgiven for thinking that anything sold in this genre. On the other hand, maybe the glut of boring self-indulgent books of this time were responsible for the decline of sci-fi as big genre for those who came afterwards. Now it is quite hard to get sci-fi published.
Other books in the set have impressed me, and it isn’t all doom and gloom. Flow my tears, the Policeman said by Philip K. Dick is an astounding work, and so were Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C. Clarke, I am Legend by Richard Matheson and Mission of gravity by Hal Clement were all excellent reads. So there were still excellent works in amongst this glut of over written rubbish. What makes me surprised is the fact that some of these bad books won prizes, gathered rave reviews and - above all – are considered masterpieces. I think that tastes have changed an awful lot. Would any of these poor works have been published today if Le Guin had gone to a publisher in 2010 and punted that manuscript around? A part of me thinks probably not.
Still, what do I know? Well, maybe beyond what I like.
The book failed to grab me; I did try and persist. Longwinded and without any real point, the first two chapters failed in any way to give me a story or characters that I could latch onto and feel for and get into. Actually, come to think of it, there seemed very little point to what I read. When I first began writing, wordy, self-indulgent stuff was referred to as 'Purple prose' and was to be avoided at all cost. Unfortunately, Le Guin didn't go to that lecture when she wrote this. She isn't alone though; even Arthur C. Clarke's early works had a habit of falling into this trap. I am forced to conclude given the rave reviews this book had that tastes have changed, and some books have not aged well.
In some respects, the 1960/70s were the years to be trying to get published if you wrote sci-fi. Stick a rocket on the cover and you could be forgiven for thinking that anything sold in this genre. On the other hand, maybe the glut of boring self-indulgent books of this time were responsible for the decline of sci-fi as big genre for those who came afterwards. Now it is quite hard to get sci-fi published.
Other books in the set have impressed me, and it isn’t all doom and gloom. Flow my tears, the Policeman said by Philip K. Dick is an astounding work, and so were Rendezvous with Rama by Arthur C. Clarke, I am Legend by Richard Matheson and Mission of gravity by Hal Clement were all excellent reads. So there were still excellent works in amongst this glut of over written rubbish. What makes me surprised is the fact that some of these bad books won prizes, gathered rave reviews and - above all – are considered masterpieces. I think that tastes have changed an awful lot. Would any of these poor works have been published today if Le Guin had gone to a publisher in 2010 and punted that manuscript around? A part of me thinks probably not.
Still, what do I know? Well, maybe beyond what I like.
Wednesday 4 August 2010
All over the house » Archive » Parrot fashion
Beware of Parrots belonging to rude people - they pick up all those snarky private comments and repeat them when you least expect it...
All over the house » Archive » Parrot fashion
All over the house » Archive » Parrot fashion
Wednesday 21 July 2010
Now that's what I call, er, crap? 17
Today in the post I received a lovely copy of NOW 17 on double LP. It's in mint condition, and I hasten to add that the reason it came here is because I collect records and am currently collecting a complete set of all the NOW albums that existed on LP (1-35, for those who are interested).
One thing I have noticed about the NOW albums is that a lot of them are packed with what we ought to politely refer to as 'better suited to being spread thinly on a field of vegetables to aid their growing' than music. NOW 17 does not disappoint in this respect. Actually, I would go as far as to say that the needle on my turntable now feels dirty for having dragged itself through that filth. I count only three, maybe four tracks that are remotely worthwhile. In honest truth a fair few of these records don't even register in the section of my memory entitled 'crap music I remember and hate from my formative years'. That means that they must have been total here-today-gone-tomorrow one hit wonders. Well, if you can call them that.
Depeche mode's 1990 hit "Enjoy the silence" is certainly the best track on there. However, I understand why there are now so few surviving copies of NOW17 - it is utter rubbish. Manufactured sacharin pish and false psuedo dance mucis that leaves the impression of a record exec who was about as far away from 'it' as it is possible to be saying "Hey, I know what the kids want, because I'm with it!". Sorry matey, but they changed what 'it' was sometime in the late 1950s and forgot to send you the memo. It is little wonder that there was such an explosion at the time in popularity of underground groups and styles that led to the first great revolution and death of the charts. I remember now why acid house and rave became so big so fast when the 'official' record company offerings comprised of garishly dressed teenagers in sideways baseball caps and not a trace of stubble on their clean cut and (urggggghhhh!) wholesome faces.
The NOW series went through a really bad time. I can recomend wholeheartedly copies of NOW 6, 8 and 10 (available for no more than £1 from any decent secondhand record shop) but after 10, they certainly slipped bigtime. It wasn't until NOW 20 that they started to find their way again, and there was certainly another big blip to come. But that was after LP copies stopped being pressed (the end came at NOW 35 - a very rare copy to find on LP) so is luckily outside the scope of my LP collection. I shall breath a sigh of relief.
One thing I have noticed about the NOW albums is that a lot of them are packed with what we ought to politely refer to as 'better suited to being spread thinly on a field of vegetables to aid their growing' than music. NOW 17 does not disappoint in this respect. Actually, I would go as far as to say that the needle on my turntable now feels dirty for having dragged itself through that filth. I count only three, maybe four tracks that are remotely worthwhile. In honest truth a fair few of these records don't even register in the section of my memory entitled 'crap music I remember and hate from my formative years'. That means that they must have been total here-today-gone-tomorrow one hit wonders. Well, if you can call them that.
Depeche mode's 1990 hit "Enjoy the silence" is certainly the best track on there. However, I understand why there are now so few surviving copies of NOW17 - it is utter rubbish. Manufactured sacharin pish and false psuedo dance mucis that leaves the impression of a record exec who was about as far away from 'it' as it is possible to be saying "Hey, I know what the kids want, because I'm with it!". Sorry matey, but they changed what 'it' was sometime in the late 1950s and forgot to send you the memo. It is little wonder that there was such an explosion at the time in popularity of underground groups and styles that led to the first great revolution and death of the charts. I remember now why acid house and rave became so big so fast when the 'official' record company offerings comprised of garishly dressed teenagers in sideways baseball caps and not a trace of stubble on their clean cut and (urggggghhhh!) wholesome faces.
The NOW series went through a really bad time. I can recomend wholeheartedly copies of NOW 6, 8 and 10 (available for no more than £1 from any decent secondhand record shop) but after 10, they certainly slipped bigtime. It wasn't until NOW 20 that they started to find their way again, and there was certainly another big blip to come. But that was after LP copies stopped being pressed (the end came at NOW 35 - a very rare copy to find on LP) so is luckily outside the scope of my LP collection. I shall breath a sigh of relief.
Monday 19 July 2010
Lie back and think of something.
Starting a new book is the hardest thing. I've written about this before, and I make no apology for mentioning it again. Not least because it's that time of the year again. My usual methods in writing a book involve a planning stage that usually sees me doing a lot of listening to music whilst thinking (stop whinging, because you can't do the same where you work and charge the time as valid business expense). With basic plot summary in my head I have a rough idea of sort of what I'm going to write. I discuss ideas a lot with people at this stage too, as bouncing ideas off some-one does help develop things, iron out wrinkles that you yourself missed and gets it well stuck in mind so that key details dreamt up to the soundtrack of Space Brothers and Delerium don't get instantly forgotten again.
Commiting to the page comes when the guilt of having no tangible output that I can hold up and say "Here, I have been working - honest. Look what I did, Mummy - stick it to the door of the fridge" gets too much. I find opening that plain, empty document template is really hard. Staring at white empty space in a word processing programme really does get you down. Current word count: 0. Target word count: 90,000. Ouch. So at this stage I try to think of an opening that flows quickly to the page, just to get something down. Sometimes this really works well, and I keep what I write. Other times (more often) it quietly gets deleted or substantially rewritten once I've got a few more words written and I think I won't miss those first few thousand hastily written daubs. In the writing section of my website I recently posted an example of the original opening to one book I wrote. Nothing of it is in the finished book, but it got the ball rolling so it did its bit.
I've written maybe 500 words, and I'm already blogging as a means of writing-avoidance. Before you know it I'll be vacuuming the carpets and dusting shelves - the joys of being a writer. Still, I've already written two books this year, with a third prepped for going to print, so it's not like I've had seven months of staring at the ceiling doing nothing but listen to music, honest.
Commiting to the page comes when the guilt of having no tangible output that I can hold up and say "Here, I have been working - honest. Look what I did, Mummy - stick it to the door of the fridge" gets too much. I find opening that plain, empty document template is really hard. Staring at white empty space in a word processing programme really does get you down. Current word count: 0. Target word count: 90,000. Ouch. So at this stage I try to think of an opening that flows quickly to the page, just to get something down. Sometimes this really works well, and I keep what I write. Other times (more often) it quietly gets deleted or substantially rewritten once I've got a few more words written and I think I won't miss those first few thousand hastily written daubs. In the writing section of my website I recently posted an example of the original opening to one book I wrote. Nothing of it is in the finished book, but it got the ball rolling so it did its bit.
I've written maybe 500 words, and I'm already blogging as a means of writing-avoidance. Before you know it I'll be vacuuming the carpets and dusting shelves - the joys of being a writer. Still, I've already written two books this year, with a third prepped for going to print, so it's not like I've had seven months of staring at the ceiling doing nothing but listen to music, honest.
Thursday 15 July 2010
Twinkle little star.
I've just finished doing the editing on the sequel to 'Bringing home the stars'. I've also finalised the name which will be 'Twinkle little star' - sounds somewhat James Patterson in style, but hey - I like it and it fits with the plot. It's only the second draft, and it didn't take anywhere near as long as the first draft did to write (thank goodness). It now goes to Zoë who will read through and suggest corrections and then I'll do a third draft of it (who ever said that writing a book was write it and print it? Oh no!). In the mean time I have another book to start work on.
Thursday 8 July 2010
New short story/other stuff.
Jennyemilyeffect has had two more short pieces uploaded to it. The first is a short piece of flash fiction - View from the window and back into the room. the second is cut material from the first draft of The Atlantic Connection.
Wednesday 7 July 2010
Website upgrade.
Just a quick note to say that the website has had a thorough spruce up. One big change is that the short stories and other bits page is far more accessible. From a purely practical point of view it means that I am able to update it myself now instead of being reliant on some techno-nerd in another office.
The new website - go take a look!
The new website - go take a look!
Vuvuselas are irritating.
I never really liked editing. Actually, I think I described it here more than once as my nemesis. I suppose that is the case when I actually have to do an awful lot. Right now I'm working on the sequel to 'Bringing home the stars'. It must be weird for most people to read about me polishing up a sequel to a book that isn't on general release yet, but bear with me....
I wrote an entire book in between finishing the first draft of BHTS2 (There is a name for it, but as I've always refered to the sequel as this, it is easier to keep track). It's the best way to go as putting a book to one side after finishing a draft means that you can have a few weeks doing something else that distances you from the creative processes of the writing. In this way, when you do come back to it, you have a clear head and can see things that would otherwise have been missed. When I last edited a book, I hated it. I suppose that was because so much was needing tweaking. BHTS2 seems surprisingly different. Almost to the point that I'm wondering if there is something that I'm missing. I've edited some 40,000 words of it in three days, and it hasn't really needed much other than the odd typo correcting, a few word repititions ironing out and a few commas and semi-colons swapped around. There was a chapter I had forgotton to finish, but that was easily solved (I must have got distracted, written the next bit intending to come back, then forgot). It isn't a bad read so far, so I'm hoping it doesn't disappear downhill towards the end. I shall also try not to blow my own Vuvusela, as I understand quite how annoying they are.
This year has been a somewhat prolific year for writing. Long may it continue. For future reference to myself, when I'm suffering the next bout of writer's block I would like to point out that having too many ideas flooding through my head and not enough time to write them down is almost as annoying as sitting at a computer staring at a blank screen struggling to let get the words flowing. I have another book idea to start work on after I'm done with this edit. I'll let you all know what it is when I start commiting words to the page.
I wrote an entire book in between finishing the first draft of BHTS2 (There is a name for it, but as I've always refered to the sequel as this, it is easier to keep track). It's the best way to go as putting a book to one side after finishing a draft means that you can have a few weeks doing something else that distances you from the creative processes of the writing. In this way, when you do come back to it, you have a clear head and can see things that would otherwise have been missed. When I last edited a book, I hated it. I suppose that was because so much was needing tweaking. BHTS2 seems surprisingly different. Almost to the point that I'm wondering if there is something that I'm missing. I've edited some 40,000 words of it in three days, and it hasn't really needed much other than the odd typo correcting, a few word repititions ironing out and a few commas and semi-colons swapped around. There was a chapter I had forgotton to finish, but that was easily solved (I must have got distracted, written the next bit intending to come back, then forgot). It isn't a bad read so far, so I'm hoping it doesn't disappear downhill towards the end. I shall also try not to blow my own Vuvusela, as I understand quite how annoying they are.
This year has been a somewhat prolific year for writing. Long may it continue. For future reference to myself, when I'm suffering the next bout of writer's block I would like to point out that having too many ideas flooding through my head and not enough time to write them down is almost as annoying as sitting at a computer staring at a blank screen struggling to let get the words flowing. I have another book idea to start work on after I'm done with this edit. I'll let you all know what it is when I start commiting words to the page.
Sunday 4 July 2010
Another book finished.
I've just finished draft one of The Long summer of war. 72,000 words of pure literary fiction goodness. Show me a happy-ever-after story and I'll show you a fist to face; I'm going back to writing sci-fi.
Saturday 3 July 2010
I really fancy a takeaway; know what I mean?
The boat didn't sink yesterday evening. Actually, it floated perfectly and remained bone dry (except for the water from my wet trainers which doesn't count) all the time it was on the water. The only problem was lining it back up with the trailer to haul it out, which resulted in a nasty scrape down the keel and the fibreglass to one side. All got sanded and touched up this morning, so no problems there.
On Monday I'm off out to buy a few important-yet-necessary items. Namesly: a trailer lighting board; spare wheel; mudguards and fittings and; some kind of security device to stop some scrote from pinching the trailer. Hopefully they won't be rip-off priced.
As it's the weekend I've only written 500 words. I feel guilty for taking days off (even if they are the two days a week that everyone else gets and takes for granted). 500 words is a compromise. Hopefully by Monday 'Long summer of war' will be done and I can get on with something else, in the form of BHTS2 editing. After that I've already got another book idea ready to write (straight sci-fi this time) so I guess I'll be keeping myself busy through until Christmas.
On Monday I'm off out to buy a few important-yet-necessary items. Namesly: a trailer lighting board; spare wheel; mudguards and fittings and; some kind of security device to stop some scrote from pinching the trailer. Hopefully they won't be rip-off priced.
As it's the weekend I've only written 500 words. I feel guilty for taking days off (even if they are the two days a week that everyone else gets and takes for granted). 500 words is a compromise. Hopefully by Monday 'Long summer of war' will be done and I can get on with something else, in the form of BHTS2 editing. After that I've already got another book idea ready to write (straight sci-fi this time) so I guess I'll be keeping myself busy through until Christmas.
Thursday 1 July 2010
Captain's log, additional
When I say 'tonight' as in the last post, I'd like to point out that I'm not in the same time zone as the server. That means that when it says it is Thursday, I'm already in Friday. Hello from the future, and all that.
Insert post title here.
A lot of today has been spent writing 'Long summer of war'. I want it done by the end of the coming weekend; I'm not too far off. Then it's back to BHTS2 and doing a second draft.
When I wrote BHTS2, everything quickly went up in the air. I found out that I had agent troubles, and what had seemed like a sure sale on 'Bringing home the stars' had faded away as charlatons of the publishing world had meddled and messed. Fast forward on a few months and things are a different story. 'Bringing home the stars' has been printed and awaits the official release date to go on general sale. Deals are being done behind the scenes to ensure that it appears in high street bookstores and more besides. Once all that is sorted, then it is on to the promotion itinery. A part of me doesn't know quite what to expect, whilst another part is secretly quite excited.
It makes it all the more important to have BHTS2 done. A first draft is a major milestone, but it is only a part of the way towards getting a book bublished. I need a proper title for a start ('Twinkle little star' is the James Pattersonesc title I have in mind). Then there is the 'heavy edit' as I call it which is the first pass through the book, seperated by a little time from the creative process of writing it. Usually I have to work at translating some of the hastily typed paragraphs into understandable English. At times it is almost amusing as to what the hell was I trying to say? But a second draft is a good refinement, and it gets closer to publishing quality. I usually give Zoë the second draft to read, and she makes notes then I go to a third draft to refine yet further. Usually, this is the first draft that publishers and agents get to see. I think that's important, as rushing stuff out to these people kind of deadons the impact when you need the impact. I'd rather they saw a polished product than one that, like my old school reports, could be described with the phrase "Nice work, but must try harder" (do Teachers the country over have a book of stock phrases to use on reports?).
I'm also finding that I need to get out of the house more. I think when you spend so much time locked to a keyboard in an office typing away, it's easy to get cabin fever. This last week I've only made it as far outside in the main as the back garden to repair my new boat. But it's a start. I get to take it and put it on water tonight for the first time. Let's hope it floats. Given the recent hot weather, let's hope that there is water at the reservoir to float it in.
When I wrote BHTS2, everything quickly went up in the air. I found out that I had agent troubles, and what had seemed like a sure sale on 'Bringing home the stars' had faded away as charlatons of the publishing world had meddled and messed. Fast forward on a few months and things are a different story. 'Bringing home the stars' has been printed and awaits the official release date to go on general sale. Deals are being done behind the scenes to ensure that it appears in high street bookstores and more besides. Once all that is sorted, then it is on to the promotion itinery. A part of me doesn't know quite what to expect, whilst another part is secretly quite excited.
It makes it all the more important to have BHTS2 done. A first draft is a major milestone, but it is only a part of the way towards getting a book bublished. I need a proper title for a start ('Twinkle little star' is the James Pattersonesc title I have in mind). Then there is the 'heavy edit' as I call it which is the first pass through the book, seperated by a little time from the creative process of writing it. Usually I have to work at translating some of the hastily typed paragraphs into understandable English. At times it is almost amusing as to what the hell was I trying to say? But a second draft is a good refinement, and it gets closer to publishing quality. I usually give Zoë the second draft to read, and she makes notes then I go to a third draft to refine yet further. Usually, this is the first draft that publishers and agents get to see. I think that's important, as rushing stuff out to these people kind of deadons the impact when you need the impact. I'd rather they saw a polished product than one that, like my old school reports, could be described with the phrase "Nice work, but must try harder" (do Teachers the country over have a book of stock phrases to use on reports?).
I'm also finding that I need to get out of the house more. I think when you spend so much time locked to a keyboard in an office typing away, it's easy to get cabin fever. This last week I've only made it as far outside in the main as the back garden to repair my new boat. But it's a start. I get to take it and put it on water tonight for the first time. Let's hope it floats. Given the recent hot weather, let's hope that there is water at the reservoir to float it in.
Wednesday 30 June 2010
When card readers rebel
A little while back, Zoë and I got ourselves into a conversation about what would happen if you removed your debit card from a retailer's card reader before the card reader said that it was okay to remove the card. You know how it is after a couple of beers on a hot day? Well, it became the script for the most recent All over the house strip. Sometimes it is strange to know exactly how the thought processes behind comic strips actually work.
Clicky for direct link to comic strip.
Clicky for direct link to comic strip.
Monday 28 June 2010
Books, boats, and an annoying ear.
So much for Summer - I think the weather has decided that we've had our alloted summer for this year. The rain started yesterday afternoon, and hasn't stopped since. We even had a massive thunderstorm in the early hours of this morning.
However, rain does not stop work. We've rec eived confirmation that one of the wholesalers has agreed to stock the book. It's more of a formality really, as we send them the information, and they send an email back to confirm that it is on their system and ready. We're still waiting on the other wholesaler, and information from Waterstones. As they are one of the biggest UK retailers, the publisher feels it wise to make sure that they know about the book and that we build up a relationship which means they see the book as something that they want to stock in all their branches rather than just as and when it gets ordered.
The boat is now as good as complete. The last of the good weather was enough to get the sealant work done, and it got covered just as the rain started. Unfortunately, the sealant seems to be white, and not clear as I ordered. This is fine on the top deck and cockpit (which is painted white anyway) but on the hull it sticks out like a, er, white strip between brown and blue. It will need a touch of paint, but with the weather as it is that can wait. It's purely cosmetic though, so there's no rush.
My hearing isn't too hot at the moment. I've had issues in my left ear since a couple of swims in Llandudno baths on holiday. Over the last week the pain has been constant and gives me headaches and neck aches too. Last night I had some dizzy spells which weren't nice. This morning it's better, but far from right. I keep hearing pops in my ear, presumably as pressure tries - and fails - to equalise properly. I'm going to be making an appointment to see the Doctor, just as soon as they are open to take calls at 9:00am.
However, rain does not stop work. We've rec eived confirmation that one of the wholesalers has agreed to stock the book. It's more of a formality really, as we send them the information, and they send an email back to confirm that it is on their system and ready. We're still waiting on the other wholesaler, and information from Waterstones. As they are one of the biggest UK retailers, the publisher feels it wise to make sure that they know about the book and that we build up a relationship which means they see the book as something that they want to stock in all their branches rather than just as and when it gets ordered.
The boat is now as good as complete. The last of the good weather was enough to get the sealant work done, and it got covered just as the rain started. Unfortunately, the sealant seems to be white, and not clear as I ordered. This is fine on the top deck and cockpit (which is painted white anyway) but on the hull it sticks out like a, er, white strip between brown and blue. It will need a touch of paint, but with the weather as it is that can wait. It's purely cosmetic though, so there's no rush.
My hearing isn't too hot at the moment. I've had issues in my left ear since a couple of swims in Llandudno baths on holiday. Over the last week the pain has been constant and gives me headaches and neck aches too. Last night I had some dizzy spells which weren't nice. This morning it's better, but far from right. I keep hearing pops in my ear, presumably as pressure tries - and fails - to equalise properly. I'm going to be making an appointment to see the Doctor, just as soon as they are open to take calls at 9:00am.
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